Sunday, April 26, 2015

lynx black under review

hi there

time for one of them unsolicited, uninvited and quite possibly unwanted consumer action review type of posts. i would like to think, look you see, that you are quite aware from the title the subject of this review, but if for some reason you missed it, it is all about that lynx black deodorant which has recently graced the market.

in recent days Spiros and i have discussed the great teachings of Vernon Pillay, one of the most extraordinary communication experts in the world. by extraordinary, it is meant that he was able to yank open any door and secure entry to a lecture hall, no matter how well we had locked or barricaded it. it is my hope that this post conveys a sense of being imbued by what it was he instructed us.

how is it that i came to own and try this lynx black? some proprietor or retailer, i forget which, had lynx on sale at around half price. in the absence of my usual choice of lynx, i went with this, as my magpie eyes were drawn to the shiny nature of it.

in terms of frames of reference (that's a Pillay teaching, as Spiros would testify), i understand that i am not the target market for lynx. the demographic which lynx targets for their product is feral teenage boys, who are encouraged to coat themselves in the scent of lynx so that they may attract feral teenage girls for the purposes of breeding, or at the least speculative efforts at actions which might be construed as being the process of breeding.

i sit in a rather different demographic, really. i would suggest that, firmly and in certain respects proudly, i reside in the demographic of 42 year olds that simply wish to smell somewhat bearable to what few friends i have, those fellow souls who must inhabit the same space as me at verk for several hours each day and of course my dear family. although from time to time i am prone to taking steps which would enhance my natural magnetism, these are mostly seasonal concerns and are in general removed from the whims and the ways of the feral teenage boys that lynx endeavour to sell these items to.

how, then, does lynx black perform? from my perspective, i would suggest that any feral teenage girl that is drawn to a lad wearing this needs, in earnest, some rather urgent medical attention in regards of their nasal skill and prowess, or otherwise they must be whisked away to be studied in a psychological sense so that the world may ascertain just what it is that they find attractive about this scent.

i think, and i would emphasise think, that the effort here was to create a "brooding musky" sort of sense for those who smell this. what they have instead created is a scent reminiscent of stale stoat urine, originating from a stoat which has been allowed to feast exclusively on the blood of sailors what have died from scurvy after being allowed only to dine on rabbits which have died from myxomatosis.

you should, in theory, be able to smell it for yourself in the below clip, as and when the technology you have catches up that that which Blackberry probably offers.


video

as has, over the years, been mentioned here in passing, it's possible that Blackberry has a secret hidden feature, a 16MB Scent Pixelator, that records smells as well as sounds and visuals. if that is the case, then one day the technology of other devices may well allow you to experience the smell for yourself. in the mean time, you could just go and buy a tin of it, i suppose, or one of them roll on sticks.

despite my slight displeasure at the scent (i have no quarrel with sailors eating rabbits, let us be clear. there is no hidden agenda there) (hidden agenda is another Pillay teaching), did it at the least perform the task for which lynx intended it to? hard to say, for i am not a feral teenage boy. i did not make any conscious effort to use wearing lynx black as a means of attracting feral teenage girls, and none would have seemed to flock to me as a consequence of simply having it on. if anything, i noticed a greater number of ladies being closer to me when i was listening to some David Lee Roth than i did when i wasn't and had lynx black on.

there are other shades of lynx that i like, and i would think i shall probably stick to them in the future. that said, i wouldn't like to create the idea that wearing this lynx black was failure in a complete sense. it was cheap, at the least, and the scent of it did not inspire all that great amount of displeasure in those near or around me.

i wish both lynx and their intended, target demographic every success in the world with this. for me, however, my relationship with lynx black comes to a dignified, mutually beneficial end with the conclusion of this particular sentence.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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