Thursday, March 19, 2015

toxic smog

hello there

and, well, oh dear. my throat feels as if it is on fire, and i have a runny nose. yes, then, dear reader, once again i have manflu, loaded as ever with ebola and sarin gas and scurvy. it is highly unlikely, now that i have less teeth to offer defence, that i shall survive this bout, look you see.

survival, or if you like being alive, is an interesting thing. it is, technically, something that neither i nor anyone else within the realm of the United Kingdom should be right now. well, maybe we are not, and the afterlife is a crazy one where everything stays the same. the news, as their main or lead story, declared that we would all be consumed by a toxic smog off them twats in France, and reported it with such drama and excitement that there was the mild suggestion that we would all soon be dead.

more on the toxic smog just now, but first this.

that, sort of in the middle, is one of the greatest novels i have ever read. well, not quite read yet. i have about the last third or so of it to go on the e-reader. i picked up The Girl On The Train over on that e-reader thing as it sounded intriguing.i knew nothing about it in particular. i have since discovered that it has been toppermost of the poppermost book charts in America for a bit, and has sold in excess of a million copies. i can well believe it, and i hope it sells many times more.

the paperback is only scheduled for release in 2016. there is a movement, a movement of which Spiros is very much at the forefront, that says "hardback books are for twats". it is not for me to challenge or endorse the veracity of this position the movement has taken in general, but in this specific case i would say to you, dear reader, that if you cannot or will not get the e-book, then rather get the hardback edition.

on to the toxic smog, then. here is an image of it, as the news promised, completely converging all across England, making it absolutely impossible for anyone to see anything, except their own lungs and liver and similar as they cough them up due to the toxic smog.

yes, that's right. this is the very same cows as i have been reporting on, only here they are in a new field that they have recently colonised, or if you like annexed. one could hardly judge them in an ill way for wanting this place in the sun. look, this one has a class bale of hay for them to dine on, and a smart tree for them to climb and play in and build a smart den or fortress in.

yes. that is Sentinel, or Lone Wolf, or whatever you want to call the leader, near the tree. it may look like Sentinel is getting ready to climb the tree, but i think i was being stared at, with the message being "soon you will die".
is this sarin gas laced, scurvy imbued ebola like dose of manflu i have, i wonder, the work of the cows as they plot revolution, or is it in some way related to the toxic smog that those twats in France have unleashed on us? who is it that will be brave enough to step forward and suggest that there is a distinct, real and dangerous connection between those two sources.

should death, as is expected, fall upon me as a result of the manflu with loads of ebola and sarin gas and scurvy in it, then remember me this way, dear reader. no, not the words you read, but that picture of me you see.

that is, of course, a picture of me wearing a white shirt. the interesting thing here is that this is a white shirt i have worn for an entire day. yes, that's right. it has remained white. no coffee stains, no cigarette ash rubbed into it, no sauce or other such food markings or leakage across it. and no, i did not conceal or otherwise hide the white shirt behind a jumper or jacket (except at breakfast), i went, as it were, commando with my eating and drinking. i shall treasure this, for if i wear the white again, it is unlikely that it will remain as unstained as this shirt did.

a video of the toxic smog totally killing all living things except cows here? sure, why not.

erm, yeah. that smoke you are seeing wafting past the lens of the blueberry camera, i should clarify, is not the toxic smog off of France come to kill us. it is indeed smoke from the cigarette i had on the go as i filmed. i thought about editing it out, or filming a scene without it, but then i thought i might as well leave it in for dramatic effect and all that. yeah, i know, the news reporters never ever get all excited and make things sound over dramatic, like us all dying from this toxic smog today, but then again i am not reporting the news.

rather obviously further updates here will be quite tricky as i cough up blood and my organs disintegrate due to that manflu thing, but i will try my best for you.

if you, like me, are presently dead because of that toxic smog today, all i can say is that i really hope it has gone as well for you as it would seem to have for me, except the manflu bit.

i think this is now twelve times my body has had to fight off an ebola infection, and it has probably been a dozen or so times i have had to battle, if not wrestle, with scurvy. it gets boring.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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