Saturday, March 21, 2015

yellow, something to do with mcdonalds and fart gun

hello there

yes, don't worry, i know exactly which part of the title of this blog post will have caused the greatest level of excitement amongst my readers - there are two videos of the fart gun in action for you to enjoy. just now, however, look you see. let us try and pretend we are a little bit more mature and have a look at far more intellectual concerns first.

several people whom i correspond with, whether it be on a formal, informal or ad hoc basis, will become quite aware of the fact that i have, of late, become particularly fond of the colour yellow. there has been, across the main retailers i choose to do business with, quite a proliferation of greetings cards complemented with yellow envelopes. most, if not all, of the cards relate to Easter. this is not something that will deter me from using them post-Easter.

other than the lovely, lovely yellow envelopes that they come in, all of the cards have most magnificent images on them, be it a bunny, a chicken or some sort of religious concern. this is an excellent selling point, as indeed is the pricing of these cards. Poundland, or Poundworld - whichever it is i go to - does 4 for £1. Card Factory are not to be outdone here, however, and they offer no less than 8 for £1.

and now that they have gotten rid of all the Mother's Day and St Patrick's Day cards, Card Factory have made extensive use of the space available to stock many of these fine cards. observe, if you will, or perhaps a better way to describe this is behold.

amazing range, isn't it? and, in truth, this is not all of them. they have even more to select from, but this is all i could get into one picture.

do i really plan to use these for correspondence post-Easter? yes. it is a simple and rudimentary bit of work with a marker pen, after all, to change the 'Easter' component of the cards to any occasion that you would care to name. and the good wishes, indeed sentiments, i wish to apparently express to people due to it being Easter are, by and large, ones i would extend to those i correspond with at any time of the year.

what's that? you are getting bored now and you want a video of the fart gun? very well.

i, wisely or unwisely, gave young William a free hand in choosing a treat for himself at the shops today. after declining two choices that were far too expensive (not that this was cheap) and deciding not to get a Transformers toy that, rather oddly, didn't actually transform, he selected the 'Minion Fart Gun' off of them Despicable Me films.

what does the fart gun do? well, when you press the trigger, as you can see in the video above (unless you are watching on an Apple device - Apple doesn't do non-Apple video), it makes fart noises. and lights up. if you hold the trigger in it activates the timer, so you can hide the gun and run away, safe in the knowledge that the fart noises shall only commence after 20 seconds.

i do like to think that my more intellectually stimulating or academically challenging posts are appreciated here, but i cannot but help suspect that the presence of a fart gun on this post will make it one of my most widely read posts of all time. so be it.

right, the McDonalds thing. here are some stickers what i prized off the cups and burger boxes for the assorted meals i was charged with obtaining for my family today.

what exactly are they? beats me. looks like something to do with that Monopoly game. i believe the cadets at verk are all collecting them as part of some sort of competition, so i will take them in for them. nice one if they win something as a consequence, if not then at least i have shown some support for their venture.

and just what have the cows been up to? well, when i saw them on Friday, right, they were trying to breed. they were doing so via the so-called "doggy style", which struck me as being cumbersome and totally inappropriate for a cow to do. a colleague, indeed contemporary of mine, expressed tacit agreement with this, and suggested that maybe instead they were trying to create one of them "human pyramid" things like what acrobats and that do at the circus.

a video of the cows attempting to breed? alas no, but a video of them anyway.

but you want more fart gun video action, don't you? at times it feels like it is me, and i alone, that is presently aware of the very great danger the cows pose to us all. never mind, let us fiddle on deck as the buildings collapse around us and watch this next video.

is the Despicable Me official Minion fart gun a worthwhile investment? well, for my £18 i seem to have got a bit of rudimentary plastic with a battery, a flashy light, a speaker and some sounds that i would rather not know exactly how they recorded.

so, yeah, it's boss. fart sounds are very, very funny indeed, after all. and Despicable Me was excellent, with the Minions being a particular highlight. should you purchase one yourself, i wish you many hours of mirth and merriment with it.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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