well, depending on when you read this, it's either roughly or precisely 9 weeks until we get to see the notorious Harlo gang again. it was with some interest, then, that i saw a number of pictures this weekend which explored exactly what it is they get up to these days.
as it turns out, it's pretty much the usual stuff, which is for most all fine and well, but rather bad news for you if you happen to be a pig.
or perhaps i am being hasty, and this was all good news for the pig. we do not know for certain, after all, what it is pigs crave from their life. perhaps being bereft of life and having an absolutely massive pole rammed through them is what they aspire to. if one follows the logic of the "meet the serial killer half way" theory presented so eloquently by Wayne Gayle in that documentary Natural Born Killers it's certainly plausible.
this being the Harlo gang, though, i am not at all sure they stopped to say "hello pig, are you one of those ones that dream of being roasted in the non-Premier League player sense?".
either way, they certainly celebrated the pig's noble sacrifice in a most Viking-esque manner, and indeed probably had as many people watching the roast as Premier League players do in their unusual interpretation of the phrase.
i quite like Andrew's "are you sure we are going to get away with this Dad" look in the above picture. it quite compliments Colin "innocent" Harland's look of surprise that someone is taking a picture, for surely there is nothing to see here so move along. it's almost as noble as Christopher's attempt, in this next picture, to obscure the view of exactly what is going on.
good work Christopher!
it's not that the Harlo gang do not have every angle covered, mind. on the off chance that this pig was wandering along, minding its own business and didn't want to be bereft of breathing, lose its head and have a massive pole rammed through it, the Harlo gang took the time, trouble and imagination to employ the best detective of all detectives to establish that he/she/it very much did.
if you look carefully at the above picture, and it is not your fault if you did not pick up on this straight away, you can work out that this might not be the real Sherlock Holmes, but instead simply Colin just dressed up as him.
i am really rather hopeful that they still have that pipe when we see them. it looks quite class, and i am very keen to have a go on it. i shall probably use it in the more intended, if you will conventional way than the Harlo gang have been, to be honest.
now then, the more astute of you will have noted that Sherlock / Colin is wearing a badge, suggesting that he is 50. you might then have got it into your head that this pig sacrifice is not quite the ritualistic slaughter i am suggesting, but rather a perfectly normal meal one would have for many guests to enjoy and celebrate a birthday. that would be a fair assumption, if only there was not one of them Da Vinci Code style clues on the birthday cake also present.......
yes, that's right. the birthday cake there, ostensibly to celebrate Colin's 50th birthday and thus justify what happened to the pig should any members of the constabulary happen to ask, has I'm Not 50 written on it. that's a bit of a giveaway clue not unlike those one would find on the cover of The Beatles' celebrated Abbey Road album, is it not?
with conflicting details about whether or not Colin actually did turn 50, and indeed if he did does that justify the removal of a pig off the face of the earth in quite the manner they did, celebrations carried on anyway. here's Andrew and Colin, with the latter looking just about as well sauced as the pig was.
that's a most excellent tankard! well, it might actually be a trophy from Andrew's cricket or Christopher's golf, i suppose, but even if it is it does seem to serve a useful purpose of being a vessel to carry drinks of the more alcoholic persuasion in.
it's good to see Andrew providing moral, and you would suspect physical, support in that picture!
whether these celebrations were genuine or something of a ruse to try and cover up what they were all up to with the pig is perhaps inconsequential, for the whole celebratory weekend did at the least provide a chance for a new picture of Gran!
great to see her, and indeed i am sure she will have enjoyed the more normal aspects and elements of just what was going on at Chez Harlo that weekend!
the observant of you will have noted Uncle Trevor in that picture too. he clearly got up to one or two shenaningans, or things at least that involved unspecified outfit changes, going on his look there and the look he has in the next picture!
the above picture has caused a touch of debate, in the polite sense, between me and my sister. i expressed the opinion that it looks like The Blues Brothers, whereas Gillian says it's more that they look like Laurel and Hardy. in retrospect, and under review, i am very much inclined to bow to my sister's interpretation.
it probably really was Colin's birthday, to be honest, but i thought the above might make for a more interesting read that "happy birthday Colin, here are some pictures". what might have also been excellent would have been a picture of the excellent, special certificate i arrange for Colin, too. in Latin, no less.
i would say that i hope all and sundry enjoyed the celebrations, but all (except possibly the pig, depending on the conclusions you draw from the above) seemed to have had an ace time, so there is little sense in me clutching to such hopes!
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!