Friday, December 13, 2013

Crusader Steel by Status, or if you like Status' Crusader Steel

hi there

a little while ago, as the rather more enthusiastic of you will recall, i posted some pictures of some new deodorant i bought. i posted the pictures of them as i had absolutely nothing else better to do, really, but quite a few of you seemed to appreciate the insight.

to that extent, i did promise that maybe i would do a review or something. well, as a thank you for the interest, here's the review.

mostly the review is this picture.

yes, that's another two tins of the Crusader Steel one. it has been popular. my (considerably) better half and indeed James say that it is better than my usual one, so there you go.

do i like it? it's all right, i suppose. seems to do its job, no better or worse than my usual choice really. i have used worse, i have probably used better.

how do i convey a review of a smell here? quite tricky to find the words to describe what this lot Status think a Crusader smells like, to be honest. and Steel smells like steel.

for a hint of the smell, here is a short video of me squirting some of it.

what's that you say? you can't smell a video on the internet? oh but you can, according to a conspiracy theory i have just this moment made up. actually i made it up in the car a little while ago, but you don't need to know that.

it is a little known fact that Microsoft, Sony, Apple, Samsung, Blueberry, Honda and them lot that did that film with that guy that did that thing are all in fact one company. further, they are run by one individual. not a person, though - a 2ft tall "sex monkey" called Mookie. Mookie is aware of how people would be confused and scared by the reality of these companies, so routinely hires people to act like they are the brains of the operation. just to make sure they do not get ideas above their station, Mookie for the most part ensures he hires people that look and act like total dicks for the roles. Mookie may well hire a certain Chelsea captain at some point.

anyway, years ago Mookie invented a type of video camera that captures smell. and this invention was rolled out. every video you have made in the last 3 - 4 years has embedded scent. Mookie is just waiting for the right time to reveal this. i think Mookie wants to see how his, as it were, pet project, letting the FBI turn on webcams at random, goes down first.

so there you have it. one day your iTwat or your blueberry or whatever will let you smell the Crusader Steel off of this video clip. when that happens, remember it was not some Japanese dude or some twat in Silicon Valley that created the technology, it was Mookie.

i fear i have already revealed too much in this post.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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