Monday, May 21, 2012

got more John Terry celebrations if you want (which you do)

hi there

well, at last it seems that the complete and utter John Terry that is John Terry has sort of got what he wished for - popularity. i suspect, however, it is not quite in the way he would have liked.

John Terry spoof pictures and "memes" as i think the kids call them are all the rage on the internet right now; the quick post i did on Sunday has already had something like 600 views!

to be honest, my views on how one solves a problem like John Terry tend to revolve around less oxygen rather than more. however, these are damned funny, and tend to put him in his place a bit. go on then, here's a few more.

it's back to the 80s when John. sure, back then the European Cup was contested only by actual champions of national leagues, but it has got so much better now that UEFA have clocked there's more money in letting more teams in. if your team wasn't good enough to be domestic champions back then, you had to watch other things instead of European football. like, for instance, the events unfold in China when students took to Tiananmen Square to protest.

having John Terry there, celebrating whatever it was that would get pictures taken of him, would no doubt gratified all of those students and in no way make them wish, or indeed pray if they were allowed to, for a quick death under those tanks.

freedom is indeed a wonderful thing, and in South Africa few who were there will ever forget the long walk to freedom taken by arguably the only politician the world has ever known never to have faced any serious criticism whilst in office.

the events in Munich on Saturday showed just how better Mr Mandela's walk to freedom would have been if only FW De Klerk had suggested that it would be perfectly acceptable to have John Terry lift up the trophy as he strolled along.

when it came to the fall of the Berlin Wall, a certain David Hasselhoff (note to kids - he is who we had to make fun of on the internet in our day, kind of like a prototype Chuck Norris or Rick Astley if you will) has often claimed that he was in many respects responsible for the reunification of Germany via his music. to that end, i really think that, to this day, Mr Hasselhoff has somewhat misinterpreted the "symbolic" way people threw chunks of the wall at him as he played a concert on or near it.

just imagine, if you will, how much better it would all have been if John Terry, rather than The Hoff, had been the one to bring unity to Germany.

that last one, oddly, is not really all that far off from representing the truth as you might think. i am fortunate enough to have many friends in and from Germany, and for the most part they were united in hoping that Chelsea did indeed beat Munich, such is their hatred for Bayern. this was in particular true of those based in the same logic, all my English friends were shouting for Bayern Munich to win - partially out of dislike for Chelsea, but mostly out of an exceptional dislike for John Terry. my dear friends from Scotland, Wales and Ireland usually don't need that good a reason to shout for whoever it is playing against (theoretically) English opponents, but it must have been strange and indeed i hope pleasant for them to discover that they were for a change shouting against an English side with most of the English, all thanks to the magic that is John Terry.

full credit to the apparently anonymous yet genius people who created the above pictures.

and full credit to O Captain My Captain, the man who returned The Ashes unto England after so many years, My Lord Michael Vaughan, for this comment : "I am looking forward to next year when John Terry holds up The Ashes". not Mr Vaughan did not say when either England or Australia won; it doesn't seem to matter to John.

right, that's your lot. never again shall he darken my site again. unless he makes an even bigger spectacle of himself and humiliates himself even more. that seems impossible, really, but when it comes to humiliating yourself, John Terry breaks the barriers.

once again, full congratulations to those Chelsea players who earned / actually played in the final / didn't disgrace themselves and can be genuinely proud of winning the Champions League.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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