a few years ago there was an incident. well, incidents happen all the time, but this specific incident was, look you see, unusual. it was unusual in the sense that it was a moment that - briefly - united the majority of the world in mirth, humour and joy.
it was back in those halcyon days of 2010, and it was an incident created by Sam Allardyce. at that time he was manager of Blackburn Rovers, a football club of some minor success but now nominally only being able to remain in a division by making ungentlemanly demands of points deductions off of other, dare i say better, teams.
anyway, the incident saw Sam Allardyce confess that he should not be manager of Blackburn Rovers, for he was on a higher level. his level was, in his modest view, the giants of the game, such as Real Madrid, Barcelona, Manchester United, etc.
all of us, if we are honest, found this hilarious if not downright hysterical. his declaration of being able to win trophies on a regularity of "week in, week out" if he were trusted with such a job were met with some disbelief.
now that he has, albeit earlier than expected, finished his stint in a top job, us doubters have been proved wrong.
the track record Sam Allardyce has left behind after his stint as England manager will never - i repeat, never - be equalled. and when i say never, i mean neither in terms of the England job or any other managerial appointment.
Sam's record as England manager reads thus :
* 100% win record
* 100% clean sheet record
* 100% never behind in a game record
well done, then, Sam, for proving that you, when given the chance, can deliver the high expectations of success. as we get ready to sit back and watch four successive defeats under Gareth Southgate - one likely to be highly humiliating as it will be off of a Gary Neville inspired Malta - we can all look back to the glory days that we had.
what reward for Sam's achievements? there's been some talk of a Middle Eastern ambassadorship, but i do hope he's rewarded with a knighthood, or one of them peerage things.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!