Wednesday, November 15, 2017

i need a dragon slayer who can save me from myself

heya

a little while ago i, in an entirely unsolicited way, shared my genius, or perhaps ingenious means and way of quitting or cutting down considerably on all things cigarettes. that clever idea can be found, if you are so interested, by clicking here, look you see. or striking there, i suppose, to be sure.

something has dawned or otherwise occurred to me in the interim, which is to say i thought of it since. no, i don't like writing like that. it's a bit wanky, really. like those pompous people who use some latin phrase to describe something - normally a legal term - and then follow it with "which is to say" and give the (proper) (and easy to understand) english translation. why not just say it in english at the start, then?

anyway, the thoughts. what i did not consider was that my no longer buying cigarette lighters would be a disruptor to the economy. and, in this instance, a negative disruptor.



yes, indeed, the short version as pictured above - if one can call it short after such a lengthy and distracting introduction - is that i elected to reverse the decision and buy four rather splendid cigarette lighters off of Poundland. yes, all 4 cost £1. which is a bargain, as back in the 80s before there was Poundland there were independent traders who stood around in the town shouting "lighters three for a pound", so you get more value now.

the disruption, then. or if you like the justification and vindication for this decision, or reversal, what i made. it dawned on me that not buying cigarette lighters was detrimental to "the economy" in a three pronged way, should that be the correct way of saying it. as in, i was doing terrible if not great harm to the economic model locally, nationally and indeed internationally or globally, depending on which of those terms for worldwide you prefer.

closer to home and not buying lighters for £1 off of Poundland would mean a fall in profits for them. this could lead to a harsh business decision, where they sack someone and install another self serve terminal. as you hardly need me to tell you, that would be one more unemployed person for the national economy to absorb and support.



internationally, well, dangerous times. a lack of demand for packs of four brightly coloured cigarette lighters would lead to a fall in production. for all i know this could have been the straw that broke the back of a camel which for some reason the country wherever these are made use to illustrate their economy. it might be that, in order to make up for the shortfall in exports, the country what makes them goes to war or invades a neighbouring sovereign state to address the balance.

all of that might, if you are in any way cynical or doubting in nature, seem like an elaborate and far too overthought excuse. you might assume that the reality, hinted at by the title of this post, is that i am a hopeless, pathetic addict that simply cannot successfully quit or cut down considerably on cigarettes.

well, yes. there is no way i can argue too hard against such. one has to have the psychological reserves and sheer willpower to do it, i suppose. in this area i have been found to be decidedly lacking and somewhat wanting. but, for now, let us look at how pretty the lighters are.



them there above are my two favourites, then. i would think the first is obvious, for it looks like a most dapper magic bus; the likes of which The Who celebrated on their song Magic Bus. the other one was the deal clincher, though, as it has a toucan on it.

as regular readers of this blog will be aware, the toucan is my most favourite bird, right after the kookaburra, the flamingo, the pelican, the hawk, the swallow, the kestrel, the eagle and that other one what i have forgotten the proper name of. it is a delight to at last celebrate the toucan in such a way.

so, anyway, let me press onwards with whatever it is that i am supposed to be doing in this world. by a certain interpretation of some aspects of this post, that could well be seen as in some small way trying to save the economy.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





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