three films

hello there

so, yes, then, i've watched a few films of late. well, three, look you see. hence this post being called what it is. a quasi custom, or tradition, is for me to pass comment on such, being for the benefit of anyone with a passing interest in what i might think of them. not so many, i would think, is that number. 

were the films i watched any good? yes (The Lighthouse), maybe (Kingsman i think it was called) and not really, not really, no (Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2022). that pretty much gives you a brief overview then. you are of course very welcome to read on, but do pay attention, and beware, for everything which comes beneath the below image is very likely to contain *** SPOILERS *** so carry on with caution. 

to start off with where i think i started would be to commence all of this with Kingsman. at least i am pretty sure this is what it is called. my understanding is that it is a prequel, of sorts, to some (i believe two) films called Kingsmen, which i have not seen. this i explained to James and William when they wished to watch it in my presence, expressing a concern that i may well not understand it all. in their view it was fine for me to watch, since as it was (is) a prequel there was no need for me to have seen the first two. pretty sure this is how Star Wars sort of works. 

anyway, what's it all about? plot and that? not really sure. i mean, i do know it features him off of all them posh films, except for when he played the one wizard with no nose in Harry Potter, and also a recurring character of a singular letter in James Bond. generally, or in general terms, it seemed to be all about some upstanding English chap(s) saving the world from some people what done a naughty. 

i quite enjoyed it, despite not knowing what was going on for certain parts, or vast swathes. all of it seemed to be splendid action sequences taped together with a vague notion of a plot. this plot may well be something that seems, or is, more clear if one has seen the first two (2) films, but no matter. one most agreeable chunk of the film featured Rasputin, which appeared to be based more on our history and understanding of this bloke from the Boney M song, rather than any actual historical fact or assumption.

on, then, or if you will ahoy, to The Lighthouse. yes, i do indeed appreciate that, at time of writing, this film is, what, 2 or 3 years "old", but i've only watched it now. most seem to describe, or give details of, the plot as it being "two men working on a remote lighthouse", which is rather nice and spoiler free. very good indeed, it was. sort of a 'gothic horror'. a complain, or concern, i have heard in passing is that people suspect or expect it to be "boring". well, no. should you have sustained the pacing of, and indeed certain similar thematic elements of, films like The Shining and the most recent Woman In Black, the one with that lad out of Harry Potter in, then you will get on just fine with this. 

being fair, i found it extraordinarily fast paced, or at the very least faster than i had expected. also, quite a remarkable film indeed. mostly down to the cast, of course, and the fact that one can say that this film is essentially (thanks to other casting) the story of Batman, Jesus Christ and a Mermaid at a Lighthouse. the nearest closest other artistic reference to this we have is Kelly's Heroes off of Black Grape. 

despite the plot / story being intriguing enough as it is, the veritable tour de force off of the actors is what resounds the most. Willem Dafoe perfectly encapsulates the concept of "salty sea dog" which i have referenced over the years. Robert Pattison is sensational, in particular in what can only be described as the furious masturbation scene (i did place a spoiler warning at the start), which i believe is something of a "trademark move" of his in films what do not feature glitter vampires or Chris Nolan. 

right, on to the expected and anticipated as being disappointment of the latest remake, sequel, take or what have you on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. i kind of knew it would be sh!t because just about all of these new versions are, but the premiere date of 18th Feb made it seem like a good idea to watch. 

just what's wrong with this latest version, then? mostly it seems unsure if it is a sequel, a partial remake sequel or a "new" thing on familiar footing. that and it opting to go for squeamish, unsettling, stomach churning gore (and requisite violence) rather than instilling any sense of fear, suspense or terror in the audience. one or two one-liners which are generally funny ("one wrong move and you're cancelled, bro") sneak in, but for the most part this resides in the "so bad it's bad" pile of films. 

my bad. oh, right. yes, i forgot, it was actually four (4) films i watched of late. how could i have let it slip my mind that also i had a look at this Don't Look Up business. 

essentially or effectively the plot of this film is that a group of (stylish, very good looking) science types discover the world is going to end via one almighty twatting off of an asteroid. they alert the world, and the world sort of just shrugs, goes "meh" and returns to the instant gratification, disposable ways what we appear to have made dominant these days. oh. 

it was all right. quite brave, i suppose, for such an A list cast to have a pop at the almighty, all celebrity worshipped Steve Jobs. the parody of Trump is slightly more predictable, but all the same rather brilliant in the hands of Meryl Streep. rather more former CSI cast members than i expected to see all at once, and yeah, the "A" list cast basically all act the same way they usually do. 

pretty sure the intention here was to make a film that's a "comment" on society, and a satire akin to, say or for instance, Dr Strangelove or Wag The Dog. it's nowhere near as good as either of those. also, it takes far too long to make a minimal point. weirdly, if this film is anything at all, it is a reworking of a not so bad Nicolas Cage film, Knowing, from about ten or so years ago. right down to the final dinner scene, now that i think on or if i recall it correctly. watchable, enjoyable, but ultimately this film is pretty much the personification of average. 

right then, that's that. no doubt (or undoubtedly) when i get chance to watch a couple more films i will put the relevant opinions here. until then, then, dig what you dig. 

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!