long has it been since i have used (or at least displayed) my powers of being able to see future events unwritten, look you see. far too long, maybe, or not long enough, perhaps. it is something that i do reluctantly but not in a hesitant way.
as fairly modest, infrequently regular readers will know, i have not one, not three, but two devices derived from an ancient time. they allow me to see what remains (for now) around the corner; to speak that which has not been spoken.
using this power is, simply, dangerous. i can sit here and claim that i shall only ever use it for good, but know that it cannot. anything which i foresee can be with the most perfectly good and pure and right reasons, but someone somewhere shall use it as a will to darkness. be warned of this before you follow further.
writing that which has remained unwritten makes it written, too. so, in a sense, my using my powers, to see what is unseen, makes it written, makes it seen, makes it so. i am sure that you have grasped a fair part of the complexities of this.
it is entirely possible that soon i shall be poisoned by my enemies, so that they may either cease my visions or try to claim them as their own. this is the nature of the realm i have ended up in, quite unsolicited if i may say so, except for the parts where i purchased the devices and used them. but, if it all comes to an end and in doing so one has allowed to touch a future they wished for, then so be it, it is done.
right, let me ask some pertinent and relevant questions that some of you may have. now is your last chance to leave the future to be discovered, rather than to know it.
shall Brexit ever actually happen?
8 BALL : chances aren't good
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given
will Boris Johnson become Prime Minister again in December 2019?
8 BALL : indications say yes
MAGIC LEMON : i don't care
if i happen to [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE] close?
8 BALL : so it shall be
MAGIC LEMON : bang on
shall Jeremy Corbyn be elected Prime Minister in December 2019?
8 BALL : prospect good
MAGIC LEMON : bang on
will America like who is elected President in 2020?
8 BALL : prospect is good
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given
can common sense prevail and Ed Sheridan's fake records be removed from chart history?
8 BALL : the stars say no
MAGIC LEMON : when pigs fly
now might be a good time for you to pause, if indeed you are still reading. i know how upsetting, shocking, distressing or entirely expected many of these revelations about that which is to come are. take a breath, maybe have a cup of tea, perhaps a cigarette, then read on if brave.
will someone ostensibly [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE] me ever [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE]?
8 BALL : no
MAGIC LEMON : i don't care
can we expect further coverage of every little temper tantrum Greta Thunberg has?
8 BALL : consult me later
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given
as you can see, the 8 ball is a bit exhausted, at the magic lemon is sucking down some negative energy. in the interests of transparency i am telling you that i am taking a break here, but this is irrelevant as writing should start again quite soon.
see, told you. kind of.
is Jo Swinson going to be Prime Minister in December 2019?
8 BALL : you can count on it
MAGIC LEMON : i don't care
will my demise bring the much desired satisfaction?
8 BALL : focus and ask again
MAGIC LEMON : not listening
from previous experience i can assure you that there is no sense pursuing any more tales of the future right now. it is draining, both on my devices and on my wrists, to press for knowing that which is unknown, and the mechanisms are now saying cease. at least, for now.
well, anyway, i hope the questions answered here coherently are if not what you expected then what you can accept. please do not use these valuable insights for anything wicked, naughty, evil or wrong. knowing that which is unknown is meant to be a gift, and if rejected can so easily turn into a burden, if not specifically a curse.
yes, certainly, unless i am poisoned or similar, at some future date i will dabble some more, seeing what can only be seen with special skills. but, should i end up poisoned or similar, well, know that i did go with regret about not being able to see more for you.
वरेण्य परस्पर !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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