two films

hey there


so, i've watched a couple of films, look you see. well, as it happens, there are a number i have watched since i last did this sort of post, but to keep it all on the pulse (so to speak) i thought it prudent, if not best, to use what (little) time i seem to have available to write of those most recently released.

much like the book reviews what i do here, how about a bit of a gander at what i watched, some spoiler free comments (or overview), and then a nice warning that spoilers may follow?

to start where that picture does, Rambo Last Blood is a hideous, vile, nasty piece of work that seemingly bears no thematic or characteristic relationship to the previous four Rambo films, unless i totally missed them. Joker, meanwhile, is a most impressive avant garde, postmodernist one man play which has somehow made a formidable amount of money for what is essentially an arthouse movie.

well, for the casual reader who for some reason wishes to see either (or both) of them films but for some reason wished to have my general opinion, there you very much have it. for all who have seen them, or are just not particularly bothered about such, do read on. if you wish to see either but have no interest in knowing much of anything of what may happen in them, consider stopping now, for from here there is a *** SPOILER WARNING *** in place.

despite the order in which the posters are presented above, it was Joker what i watched first, so that is where i shall start (or if you like commence) here. which is quite nice, as by some formidable distance it is very easily the better of the two films.

i had little or no idea of what to expect when setting off on the task of watching this one. from what i could gather, it was and was not a standard "origins" film of a character one would be hard pressed to deny as being best known as Batman's number one nemesis. the intention, evidently, was to explore the character with an ambiguous free hand.

with this in mind, a really, really bad way to try and watch this film is to do so in a way that you try and tie it into or link it with any of the cinematic Batman variations from over the years. it shall just lead to disappointment, and maybe some confusion.

ok, enough of what it is not, then, and more on what it is, if the italics i have used there make any sort of sense. and effectively this is one reasonably budgeted (i think the entire budget came in at just around the basic before profit percentages amount of money Jack Nicholson got for playing the same character 30 years ago) film of a one man play. yes, there are other characters in it, but make absolutely no mistake at all, they might as well not be, for the only thing you are ever watching is Joaquin Phoenix.

that the film has hoovered up in excess of US$1billion around the world probably tells you how good a performance Joaquin gives in this film, but for the sake of this being my blog, my views, etc, i can indeed tell you that he is truly exceptional. sure, i always thought he was very good indeed in things like To Die For, 8mm and so on, with me always having a soft spot for Buffalo Soldiers too. but, this is at a whole different level.

an entirely unsettling level too, of course. much has already been written of the way in which the film goes about addressing and depicting mental health, the lack of support and treatment in society, and of course the elements of violence which occur. let me not add waffle to this, then, except to confirm that this really is frequently uncomfortable viewing. but uncomfortable because of just how good and powerful the performance by the lead actor is.

yes, the film can instantly be grouped with those that dealt either with alienation or had the ambiguity presented well enough to allow an audience to decide themselves if what they have watched "really happened" or just occurred in the mind of the protagonist. without saying which group they belong to, films in such company include Taxi Driver, American Psycho, Fight Club, A Clockwork Orange, and, well, several others.

it is also true that Rambo Last Blood is frequently to be found to be uncomfortable viewing, but for really different reasons. this would be not so much that it is a masterpiece, as it is not, but very much due to the fact that it is a nasty, vile, graphic exploitation flick with a right wing slant that is as curious as it is disturbing.

plot? an apparently retired John Rambo lives on his deceased father's estate with his housekeeper. mostly he keeps busy training horses, and trying to rescue people out of floods. when the housekeeper's daughter(i think, could have been niece) goes missing, off he goes to find her. when it turns out something repulsive, ugly and vicious has happened to her, so he goes off on a quest for blood vengeance. and believe me, it is graphic. normally i am partial to gratuitous sex and violence, it is true, but this is just plain nasty.

the biggest problem here is that it simply never feels like a Rambo film, at all. for comparison, think Blade Runner 2049. whilst in that film there are considerable merits, the biggest flaw to it was that Harrison Ford apparently forgot that he was playing Rick Deckard and spends much of the film being some weird cross between Han Solo and Indiana Jones. you can get away with that when its not the main character of the film. Stallone electing to all of a sudden make his character some Charles Bronson or similar revenge vigilante type is very much at odds with the other four films featuring the character. 

one of the biggest issues for me is that this film exists at all. at the end of the fourth film there was a shot of Rambo "going home". there was an understated ambiguity to this, one could choose to see this as him going to a literal home, or at last being at peace with himself, either within himself or even by his passing. a rather eloquent end, but that ambiguity has all gone now.

i am not going to get bogged down with all the claims of racism, xenophobia, stereotypes and what have you that have been spoken about as being apparently integral to the film. but yes, such would seem to be there, along with the as mentioned staunch right wing view of justice. indeed, there is a logic one can see in being harsh, brutal and sadistic with harsh, brutal and sadistic criminals, and trust me you see such here. the judicial approach of an eye for an eye sounds good, but ultimately before long everyone is blind.

reflecting on the movie, this film is out of time. the best way to have watched this film would have been in the 80s, with a few mates and several cans of lager, on a 2nd or 3rd generation bootleg VHS as the BBFC at the time would have either banned this film entirely or censored it to ribbons. in the here and now, it is not a motion picture which makes any immediate sense to exist.

anyway, that's that. if any of this has been of any remote use or interest to someone, well then that's splendid, that is, to be sure.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

an imitation of dignity

howdy pop pickers


well, this is awkward. no, not for you, look you see, but for me. i am writing this some (oddly exactly) eight months prior to it being set to go live on this blog. that seemed like the best option, in truth, as if i had set it aside to "write later" i would have forgotten.

for the most part i have, this year, taken the decision to drop the usual celebrations of anniversaries of gigs what i was at. well, why not, or why, really. pretty much all that i had to say of any of them has been said by now, so let them go.

but then, as fate would have it, back in April (which is where i sit now), i found this.

yes, it is a little bit of advertising. promoting, no less, the Greatest Hits Tour, or "shenanigans" as the lead singer mentioned more than once, of the Manic Street Preachers. we, as in my (considerably) better half and i, crossed timezones and oceans to be in attendance at one of the gigs listed above, the Newcastle one, 17 years ago.

there were two significant motivators for this. actually, three. first off, i suppose, is that we both have a love for the Manics, and when a band starts announcing "greatest hits" tours, one is never sure if this is them saying farewell. secondly, the support for them at the gig was provided by no less than Ian Brown, who we also love dearly. if you want it, a third would be that we were to be wed not too long after the gig, so having the honeymoon "before" kind of made sense.

provenance of the advertisement, or little impromptu "promotional card"? ostensibly Poundland, i guess, as it was in a CD what i purchased off there for £1. kind of.

indeed, i bought not one, not three, but two copies of Forever Delayed, the band's first go at a greatest hits thing. the second, National Treasures, did not go at all well, but live and learn.

why two copies? mostly because they had two on the shelf. the logic was that if i got two, then i could have one in my vehicle of choice as i roamed the lands, whereas my (considerably) better half was free to do as she saw fit with the other, either having it in her vehicle of choice or giving it a spin at home.

as it turned out when i got home, not two identical copies as such. for the win, and as a bonus, one of the copies i picked up turned out to be the what we would now call "deluxe" edition, for it featured a second disc, filled with perfectly serviceable remixes of some of the songs.

is Forever Delayed as a CD set any good? yes is my answer, but i am obliged to rather describe it as "functional". from what i recall there were several ounces of displeasure from both the band and the fans about it. not that this is unusual. in the entire history of music bands, never has there been the odd situation which exists with the Manic Street Preachers. whereas their fans are obsessive and will defend them to death, frequently they absolutely hate the band and express displeasure. this is very much reciprocal, for despite a devout dedication to their fans, the bands seem all to eager to treat their followers with the contempt and disgust we probably, in fairness, deserve.

at the very least, Forever Delayed was not the folly of Lipstick Traces, the "follow up" compilation concentrating on b-sides which came out some two years later. from what i recall it was a bewilderingly bad selection of such, omitting ones the fans desired, with particular emphasis on Patrick Bateman. also, us fans were expected to download and print the booklet to go with it ourselves. nice cost cutting idea, and it did not go down at all well when the fans went one further and said "why don't we just download the whole album too, for free, and record it on our own discs" by the time the next album, the superb Lifeblood that the band hate (because it did not sell well), came out.

but yes, if for some reason you like the Manics, or find yourself thinking that you might like them, then Forever Delayed is a most splendid set to locate, obtain and listen to. for a start, one of two exclusive tracks on this set, There By The Grace Of God, is magnificent.

should it be of interest - be it passing, very, curious or general interest - then yes i have indeed got a link for you for some pictures. the pretty, colourful words here are a link to some photographs from the day, taken, as i recall, with one of them disposable camera things. which no, i am not sure if you can actually get any more.

oh yes, i do indeed still love the Manics, and shall forever. also, since related, the exact same is true for my (considerably) better half, but that's too sweet a thing to say i suppose.

many thanks, as ever, for reading



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

in 1985

heya


around about now, or at least at the time of publication, look you see, it would generally be when some last minute gift purchases were being made. this would be ahead of the Christmas tradition of gift getting and gift giving, to be sure.

just 34 years ago the absolute best present you could get for someone would be a smart new game, on tape, for their Commodore 64. or, you now, two or three games which were quite class and brilliant, showcasing the potential of the ultimate computer.

for fun, then, and just to put a post up to prove that if nothing else i am probably not dead yet (these posts are written a couple of weeks in advance, so one never knows), here are three of the many smart games one could have got for Christmas in 1985.

best of the lot was probably ace, an acronym for air combat emulator, or something like that. class this game was, impressively coming out a good few months before the film Top Gun, letting you play Maverick and Goose long before you ever knew who they were. although i preferred Ice Man, as he had the better hair and was a better pilot.

this game worked best with two of you, with one being Maverick with the joystick and the other being Goose with the keyboard. usually i tried to play this with my dear friend Norman B@stard, who back then wished to be a fighter jet pilot and probably would still do that now, if asked. he tended to get annoyed with my approach of firing off all of the missiles and flares whilst we were still on the runway, but these things happen.

American sports seemed quite exotic and interesting to us growing up in the 80s. well, why would it not. in the UK football was plighted by hooligans and woeful players, rugby was all low scoring all kicked dull draws, we were rubbish at tennis and not as many of my friends as you may think loved cricket as much as i. the glimpses we got of american football, baseball and basketball looked quality.

now that i think, i am not sure the Commodore 64 version of World Series Baseball ever actually got released. i don't remember having it. the game was certainly on the Spectrum, as my other good friend Mike had it, and we played it. presumably the game cost more for the Amstrad to punish the people silly enough to buy an Amstrad.

from what i remember this very early, possibly first ever, computer game of Blade Runner was really rubbish. as in, unplayable crap. the only reason i have included the advert for it is the tag line. i can remember some story about how they made the game, but then one of the rights holders refused to let them licence the film for the game, so they had to do some legal shenanigans and say that it was based on the rights available soundtrack.

i really can't remember all of the details, but there was one rights holder to Blade Runner who flat refused to let anyone do anything with it. they had to wait for him to be dead before they could finally do things like release the lavish 5 DVD box set loaded with extras. go figure.

well, anyway, there you have it.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

christmas crooner

howdy pop pickers


well, what can i say. something of a tradition has developed, look you see, which sees me purchasing a Christmas themed CD off of Poundland around this time of year. as would make sense, what with it being the season, or time of year, for such.

usually, as was most decidedly the case last year, it is a set of recordings of The King, Elvis Presley that i purchase. no matter how many times or instances there are of me already owning the recordings bought. this year has, however, seen an entirely different approach. a change is as good as a rest, so they say, or at least so Poundland believes, for the main motivation behind the change of pace for Christmas 2019 was that they did not have any Christmas recordings of The King, Elvis Presley available for patrons (such as i) to buy.

yes, oh yes. my Christmas listening this year, except for the parts where i am listening to my many versions of the yuletide recordings of The King, Elvis Presley, and of course the b-side to the 12" of The Power Of Love by Frankie Goes To Hollywood, shall indeed be all Mr Sinatra. this most elegant of sets was a no-brainer or auto-pilot purchase the moment i saw it, in truth. and why not.

no, you are right in what you can see above. for some reason all the copies what Poundland had of Christmas With Frank Sinatra by Mr Sinatra featured the booklet put in the case upside down. if he were around i have every confidence and absolutely no doubt that Mr Sinatra would have given instructions for them to remedy this, or face having him find out who was responsible and seeing him to go "bust his ass", as the Americans seem to call such things.

perhaps Poundland has simply clocked that their target market for cheaply made, mostly royalty free recordings hastily cobbled together for a profit is not particularly getting younger. no more am i up to the rock and roll excesses of The King, Elvis Presley, and instead yearn for something more mellow and smoothing, such as Mr Sinatra. good.

what i really like about this CD set is the respect. despite the fact that it is called Christmas With Frank Sinatra by Mr Sinatra, the manufacturers, or producers, have felt obliged to indicate that each and every singe song on the disc is a Mr Sinatra recording. this is as it should be.

you would think that Christmas was a particularly pleasing time of the year for Mr Sinatra and his inner circle, especially the more trusted members of the 'Rat Pack'. it probably was for everyone, even Glass Eye, despite the fact that Jewish people doing Christmas records was not really trendy in his era, like how it is now thanks to Neil Diamond and Barbs. on the basis of everything we know, however, and when i say "know" i do kind of mean "speculatively guess". there is a strong likelihood that Dean Martin did not enjoy it anywhere near as much as you might have thought.

someone (and modesty forbids me from saying who) has gone a great deal of research into the subject of how Mr Sinatra, aided by Glass Eye, used to sell any and all busted video or home entertainment equipment to Dean Martin, and at a profit. whilst such made a great deal of sense for Mr Sinatra, it was all to the inadvertent detriment of Deano, or if you like Dino.

on the basis of the above (let's just assume that it is plausible if not factual), there is every chance that Dean Martin, deep down, disapproved of the times when Mr Sinatra dropped by Dean Martin's mansion over Christmas. on such instances, there can be little doubt that Mr Sinatra will have felt compelled to sing a Christmas tune or two, for the benefit of both Dino (Deano) and any guests he happened to have at home. it is not unreasonable to assume, or take as a given, that Mr Sinatra would probably have billed Dean Martin for each performance, probably at a rate of between $5,000 and $10,000 per song.

please, do not mistake this for any sort of sign of greed on behalf of Mr Sinatra, or him (in conjunction with Glass Eye) finding it very amusing to torment Dean Martin in such a way. as a staunch and proud American, Mr Sinatra simply believed in fair and relevant pay for services rendered. in the grand scheme of things, $5,000 is an absolute bargain for having Mr Sinatra come to your home and sing a Christmas tune.

many of you may be wondering, or even directly asking, if this CD happens to be any good. well, yes, of course it is. that is the Mr Sinatra on the record. to suggest that anything he did is anywhere even slightly short of magnificent is going to get you into an awful lot of unnecessary and painful silly bother.

right, well, best i get back to listening to my variations of Christmas recordings. let me express a wish that whatever music you are currently playing at this time of year is seasonally appropriate and enjoyable. also, a reminder that if your choices are for some reason not the Christmas works of either The King, Elvis Presley or Mr Sinatra, well then you are doing it wrong.

in conclusion, i propose a toast of thanks to Poundland for making this selection of recordings available at a most agreeable price. certainly, if nothing else, far more economical in cost than what Dean Martin had to pay to enjoy them.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bad bad news

heya

fairly, or reasonably, recently i was listening to a spot of provincial radio, look you see. well, maybe look you hear but anyway. it, the wireless, was "on" so as to provide some distracting sound as i completed some task or other, quite likely that it was doing the dishes. on this particular broadcast they were discussing recent DVD and Blu Ray releases.

my attention was drawn from the dishes (or whatever) and to the radio when they mentioned one of them "special edition" DVD and CD sets was coming out in regards of the film Eat The Rich. by no means was this a film that i recall fondly, but memories are that it was not all that bad, and that the soundtrack was quite smart. 

it was in investigating the availability and price of this new Eat The Rich release that i became aware of something that was of far (as in considerable) more interest to me. that would be a (it said) new release of the Bad News films, with a suggestion that it was a "complete" set. 

so yes, but of course i purchased. right up to the point of watching this set (and that is a warning of what is to come) anything issued in the name of Bad News was an autopilot purchase. not that much got released, which is a great shame. it is just wonderful that so many out there seem to fondly remember the band as much as i apparently do.

infuriatingly i could find no, as in zero, information dans le internet about what exactly this double disc set contained. sure, it was going to have the two films, Bad News Tour and More Bad News, but what else, i wondered? what unreleased stuff was there? i knew of very little that had not had an official release on VHS or DVD. the short "wish list" would be some footage from a gig, the Cashing In On Christmas video and the Comic Relief thing they did. of them, the latter always struck me as unlikely, as Colin Grigson did not appear.

making the lack of information all the more infuriating was the price. this is not a cheap set. if one is lucky they can find it for slightly north of £15, but be prepared that it seems mostly available for a brokered fee considerably north of that. and, depending on what you already own, it just might not be worth getting.

on the plus side, excellent packaging. some effort has gone in here. you get fancy picture printed discs and a glossy booklet. for the most part the booklet is a reprint of an interview, frustratingly printed in an impenetrable way, for the small orange text on black does not work too good. but still, some lovely images.

things started going south when i popped the first disc in. well, technically the second disc, for of course i went straight for the extras. i can pretty much recite the films backwards to you, and my interest was just in the extras really. moving on, and what one is confronted with when the disc comes up is an FBI warning, threatening you with a (presumably US) $250,000 fine if you pirate that what you have just bought. then i remembered why Completely Bad News felt familiar. it was a USA release a few years ago. one that i looked at, and ultimately decided not to import at the time. whoops.

so, with this in mind, it appears the "unreleased bonus material" might, and most likely does, relate to the USA (and i suspect Canadian) market. breakdown of the extras after the pretty picture of the boys below, taken from the booklet.

not sure how i have to word it to make sure you google enthusiasts get this hidden information. but here goes. here are the details of the extras and bonus material on the Bad News dvd set.

Bohemian Rhapsody - the ace music video, previously released in the UK as a video single.

Behind The Scenes - actually the second track on the Bohemian Rhapsody video single, really called Every Mistake Imaginable. the quality is utterly shocking, like a low resolution poorly buffered rip from You Tube. the DVD i have made myself off my VHS single is of far superior quality.

The Making Of Bad News / The Bad News Story - finally, i thought, something new and interesting. no. on the DVD case it says "making of", on the disc itself it says "Bad News Story". essentially a 12 minute thing made up mostly of footage from the two films, with some new(ish) (about 10 years ago) footage of Den Dennis and Spider Webb. it is that latter bit, plus some interview snippets with Jeff Beck, which is of interest.

La Tourne Infernal - presumably originally for the Canadian market, here you go. this is Bad News Tour dubbed in to French. i have no need for this and less interest, don't know about you.

Photo Gallery - some standard images of the band, shown as the film (rather than the slower album) version of Warriors Of Genghis Khan plays.

Trailers - advertising for other Comic Strip ventures. includes the classic A Fistful Of Traveller's Cheques.

should you not have the Bohemian Rhapsody video single or a functional VHS, then perhaps this is worth somewhere north of £15 to you. i would suggest, maybe, just watching the video as uploaded to You Tube countless times should cover it for you.

as for the films, well, yes, as brilliant as ever, as funny now as they were on first viewing. maybe even funnier, as time has been kind. for the record, yes, More Bad News has all of the "f" words bleeped out. this appears to be the only version to exist, never on tv, VHS or DVD have i heard it unedited. being fair, the bleeps seem to make the expletives funnier.

yes, of course, ostensibly the price is proverbially "worth it" for the two Bad News films alone. do some shopping around, however, and you can get a much better deal. for (normally) south of £15 you can get a set called The Best Of The Comic Strip Presents. that set features both Bad News films and some other classics, most notably the previously mentioned A Fistful Of Traveller's Cheques. as to why that one is so celebrated, well, Hotel Bastardos.

if you wish to go full tilt, both Bad News films (of course) feature on The Complete Comic Strip Presents, which can be bought for around £30. yes, Traveller's Cheques is on there too, along with The Supergrass, which is really, really funny. also, Supergrass features (trying to be spoiler free here) the following equation = Robbie Coltrane + chainsaw + unique mix of Two Tribes by Frankie Goes To Hollywood. say no more.

a similarly packaged "mega" box set of Bad News is due out on December 20. of this year, being 2019. the price being quoted is an eye watering £80 or so. going on this release, it will not be bought. again, there is an infuriating lack of information on the "mega box", but from what i can tell it features these DVDs, the two albums on CD, and some unreleased "live" CDs of the band. also an Alan Metcalf business card. not wishing to show off, but as i have the two different CD releases of Bad News (the 2nd release featuring much of the 2nd album), the tape of Bootleg and now the films on DVD twice, as well as vinyl, VHS, etc, i suspect i can live without live recordings that will not be listened to and a business card.

quite the missed opportunity, this. a better quality copy of Every Mistake Imaginable (i would have given them my VHS to master off), and the Cashing In On Christmas video rather than the French dub version of the first film would have made this the perfect set. to quote that other famous metal band, it's a fine line between clever and stupid.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

steel on the skyline

hello there


it is not uncommon, look you see, for me to find stray items on discarded on the roads that fate has decreed i travel. as point of fact, many such instances of this have been documented here, usually to the general pleasure of you readers.

there is, if anything, a peculiar frequency with which i seem to stumble upon stray clothing, with gloves in particular being a rather popular item for members of the public to happily toss aside, leaving them to lay as they fall. yes, indeed, that is what shall be at the centre of this post, or if you like the reason for it.

hopefully i am not alone in thoroughly enjoying stretching my imagination out with some indulgent exercises. every now and then i do this by engaging in some wilful speculation as to the story behind a discarded garment. indeed, such is the stuff of this post.

when i first spotted the above, my thoughts were pretty much those which you would have had. actually, no, my first thought was of course to take an image of it in Commodore 64 mode. shortly thereafter, it was the case that my thoughts were (probably) what yours were, which is that it seemed like someone had dropped one of them splendid, dapper driving gloves.

on closer inspection, as you can see quite clearly above, this was not (quite) the case per se. no. far from it, although also (reasonably) close. a rather ingenious person appears to have crafted - for an unspecified use - some gloves out of that thin black plastic material what they now make those rubbish bin bags out of. yes, i am an advocate of a return to the days of solid, no-nonsense thicker bin bags. the only thing that happens with these "environmentally friendly" (thanks, Greta) thin bin bags is that the world ends up using more, for you have to double or triple bag your bin to try and avoid tears and spillages of rubbish.

rather than linger on the deft skill and remarkable precision of this garbage bag gauntlet, i am more curious as to how and why it ended up discarded. yes, sorry for using the american term "garbage" there, but it helped with some quasi (slight) alliteration. kind of.

of course i like to both believe and think the best of people. in this respect, i imagine that the glove is here on the ground after being dropped to challenge someone to a duel. maybe an ill-advised letter, containing some declaration of love that was either inappropriate or misguided, flared jealousy and sparked a chap to challenge the would be suitor to a bout of fisticuffs or some other measure of physical prowess to resolve the matter.

to briefly go back to the bin bag debacle, another thing. exactly how many other dreams does that lass have that we are all able to "steal" them? she got given a massive yacht to sail around in, and gets to call on the likes of him out of Titanic and him off the coffee ads to go to dinner and that. for me that would be most of my dreams covered, but there you go, her temper tantrums suggest she dreams more than me.

and another thing, right. i am fed up of people using the incorrect variation of "dual" or "duel" in written conversation. duel here is used in the challenge, the contest and the battle sense. one should use the "dual" variant when they mean two of something that are in a way related. so yes, please stop just taking if for granted that the spelling you use is accurate.

well, at least i think this was a smart glove made out of bin liners. for all i really know it could be a regular material glove, whatever they make such from, that is a bit battered and just has bin bag esque qualities. i really had neither the time nor the inclination to have a closer look.

my assumption would be that any interest you had in this subject has now been exhausted or in some way satisfied. with that being the case, what better time to depart from it all.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how did it get so late so soon

hey there


well, here we are. the twelfth month of the year, being the last such, look you see, means a twelfth and final gander at the calendars what i have placed around the house. ostensibly this is done that so you who cannot be bothered to buy your own calendar may gaze upon mine with interest and plan the days ahead.

sadly there is not all that much of interest in the name of the month. december stems from the Roman era when calendar years comprised of a decidedly decimal ten months, with the "dec" out of the name being a suggestion of the latin (or whatever) for the ten of the decimal making it ten. when some monks somewhere decided to cock around and make the year twelve months it seems absolutely no consideration was given to renaming it twelcember or similar. mostly, you would imagine, because it sounds crap.

the idea, or if you like concept, of "saving the best until last" appears to have been lost or misinterpreted by them what made this "retro car" calendar. yes, truly, those with a keen eye will have observed that this month - let us not forget the last of this year - sees the 1972 Vauxhall Viva being showcased. of the many, many issued facing modern day life, absolutely none of them feature the fact that the Vauxhall Viva being absent from the streets as a cause or potential solution.

any memorable or otherwise notable dates in December? well, yes, there are one or two fairly obvious ones that i suspect i have no need to place here. but, here are a few others for your consideration.

3 - happy birthday Daryl Hannah out of Splash, Blade Runner and Wall Street, born this day in 1960.

5 - The Shakin' Stevens EP by Shakin' "Shakey" Stevens debuts on the UK singles chart on this day in 1982.

7 - history, with a heavy heart, records that this day in 1980 turned out to be the last ever day that a Beatles reunion would have been possible.

9 - on this day in 1984 the British public betrayed the great, the truthful and the righteous Frankie Goes To Hollywood by knocking The Power Of Love off the number one spot. instead the people bought a record by a bunch of second rate or unknown (in comparison to Frankie) pop stars which effectively was a song asking for dinner.

13 - theoretically, on this day in the UK in this year (2019) there are two or three (maybe four) people who might be a newly elected prime minister, or all of them may be claiming victory.

19 - in an ominous moment that in retrospect showed how downhill the world was going to go the moment we left the 80s, legendary actor Lee Van Cleef died on this day in 1989.

20 - back when the singles charts mattered, on this day in 1987 the Pet Shop Boys won the most hotly contested battle for the Christmas Number One spot ever to happen. they did so with their decidedly left field cover of Always On My Mind, beating out favourites such as The Pogues with Kirsty MacColl, Rick Astley, Alison Moyet and Mel Smith out of Smith and Jones.

25 - Francis Ford Coppola chose to release the ill-advised monstrosity of a mess that was Godfather Part III on this day in 1990. which just goes to show how little of a f*** Francis Ford Coppola gave about the reputation of The Godfather, film lovers or Christmas.

26 - Channel 4 (in the UK) went right ahead with a broadcast of a generally satisfactory 'Christmas' special edition of Max Headroom, with some guests on the show.

29 - a very happy birthday indeed to Aled Jones out of Walking In The Air, or whatever it was called. The Snowman, i think. say what you will, but with the gift of his song he has brought pleasure to millions, and that is what life is all about, man. well, it should be, look you see.

31 - on the tele in 1973, ITV opted to say goodbye to the year and hello to 1974 by broadcasting the film The King & I and then a special comedy thing ostensibly hosted or fronted by Bernard Manning.

but, as ever, my suggestion is you rather live for the moment, make your own memories and don't worry so much about what might have been.

yes, of course, a last look for the year that is year at the most splendid Winnie The Pooh calendar which has beautified our kitchen. many of you, i know, prefer to plan your month ahead by using this one. which is great, just great, but also as shame as i suspect that there will not be another of these calendars on display next year. not by me, at the least.

indeed, that is the two most loved and treasured characters out of the "expanded universe" of Winnie The Pooh, namely Winnie and Tigger, frolicking and playing with feathers. as bears and tigers are so well known for doing.

the new calendars are all set and ready to go for the new year, or if you like 2020. well, actually it shall be 2020 whether you like it or not. one is a most splendid gift, and the other was purchased off of Poundland. alas, Poundland did not have any Winnie The Pooh ones for sale, but something of an familiar favourite shall return.

and that's that for this, then.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

one man betrayed with a kiss

howdy pop pickers


every now and then - not often, look you see - a memory comes back which feels like a completed circle. something takes you back to such vivid recollection that you can say yes, it is accomplished, it is done, should it all end now, then with this i go if not freely or without resistance then very much at peace.

it may seem ridiculous to speak so in respect of "just" a compilation of songs, in particular one which (as we shall see as we go, if you read on) was not particularly loved or cared for, but each and every one of us sees things in variations of ways. for me, music has always been it.

yes, then, this is my post on the first proper release of Now That's What I Call Music 4 on CD. indeed, fact fans, pedantic types and those with an eye for details, indeed a version of it was released on CD at the time, albeit a much shorter version than what you got on lp or tape. and so badly did it do that CD issues of the series stopped again for a little while.

this set got hammered, caned, spannered, battered, or however you want to say it. well, tape one did, in my walkman. for me it was an absolutely perfect pick of songs, despite absolutely none of my "major" favourites at the age of 11 and 12 featured. not sure why tape two (which is now CD 2) didn't get much play. actually, i can't ever remember seeing it, perhaps it just went missing or something.

let it not be said that it wasn't just any of "my" major favourites absent from Now That's What I Call Music 4. to show how insanely good a year for music 1984 was, well, this set showcases some incredible songs, yet excludes arguably the three biggest bands of the year - Frankie Goes To Hollywood, whom spent 30% of 1984 at number one in the chart, Duran Duran and Wham.

popping in CD 1 and pressing play was to indulge in sheer bliss. if you are of a similar age to me, give it north or south a couple of years, then you may well have similar memories. or perhaps i am truly all alone here. the track listing is below, and way down below in non-Commodore 64 mode.

what exactly makes this all so good? i am unsure that i can give a qualified answer, for clearly my nostalgia is in overdrive. basically - and this is all just CD 1, which was once tape one - it's fifteen excellent songs, all put together with a wonderful flow, plus the comical folly that is The War Song by Culture Club. that, one can only assume, was included either for a laugh or contractual obligation reasons.

much delight is to be had in the fact that Now That's What I Call Music 4 as a 2019 CD set is exactly how Now That's What I Call Music 4 sounded as a tape or lp in 1984. up to now the welcome release of these sets on CD have been dogged with needless controversies - missing tracks and the wrong mixes or versions being used have marred the experience. forth time lucky, then.

but of course, them what do the Now series would get it spot on correct with the one volume (at least in respect of the 80s) that was the least popular. so ludicrously rich with music was 1984 that this set does not feature many - if any - number ones on it at all. sure, quite a few of the songs on this set have come to be regarded as the classics they are, but at the time what you find on this set are the "nearly big hits" of the year.

many thanks indeed to them what take the time and trouble to do all that Wikipedia stuff. the below is off their web thing, and gives a nice for those who like such things look at just how poorly Now 4 sold in comparison to the other 9 volumes of the first 10 of the series.

at the risk of sounding like an apologist, there are of course reasons for the fall off of sales, with few of them being related to the compilation in itself. for a start, there was a finite budget for music at the time, and Frankie Goes To Hollywood had only just released Welcome To The Pleasuredome. it sold big, that. people forget, but at the time it was estimated that one in four households had purchased the record. also, a certain thing called Do They Know It's Christmas? was released as a 7". for the first time ever, people felt they could genuinely change the world (for the better) via music, and so multiple purchases were made. yes, also a set called The Hits Album came out at the same time. mostly it was crap in comparison, but it did  have Jump by (proper) Van Halen on it.

listening to the discs, and looking at the tracklisting, i suppose if nothing else Now That's What I Call Music 4 for the general listener showcases something of an extraordinary phenomenon that feels (possibly incorrectly) decidedly 80s. That is big name (or reasonably close) artists doing one off songs for films that are not a Bond theme. five of them exist on this set.

for those that want them highlighting, you've got a what i believe is unique to this set version of the ace No More Lonely Nights by (now Sir) Paul McCartney from the hideously bad film Give My Regards To Broad Street. straight after that you get what must be the totes biggest case ever of a song outliving the film in the form of Together In Electric Dreams. although i liked the film. then you get Limahl doing Never Ending Story (guess the film) too. over on disc (tape) two you get Ray Parker jnr doing Ghostbusters, as well as the magnificent Sexcrime from 1984 by the Eurthymics. in respect of the latter, i really, really wanted the 12" single, but that featured the name of the song in massive letters. too late now, i suppose, but 11 year old me felt kind of awkward about taking that up to the counter at HMV.

buried away on tape two is a song called Pride by someone called U2. walking back in my mind to 1984, this was probably the first time i was aware of hearing the band. being 11, in England, under a Thatcher government and a dominant right wing press, all i was reasonably aware of about Ireland was that they were quite cross with England and some gang called the IRA kept bombing people. i was oblivious to any reason at all as to why they would do this. with this in mind, it was just the case that when Pride came on i heard a very angry Irish bloke shouting about love and shooting someone, so tuned out. the very next year i was baffled as to why that band were on the Live Aid stage, but then two years later they released an album which made everything make sense, and indeed made them the biggest band in the world.

any other highlights? just about everything except the rancid Culture Club song. my all time favourite tunes by Thompson Twins and OMD are right there, a classic Style Council tune, a throwaway catchy number by (now Sir) Elton John, the melancholy guilty pleasure of Missing You, the banging Repsect Yourself off of Kane Gang, a fun Feargal Sharkey number, some toe tapping happiness off of Status Quo, class tune from Rockwell and a bearable song by UB40. and all of that without mentioning an all time great just happening to be there, Lionel Richie's Hello.

indeed, yes, i have purchased all of the reissued Now That's What I Call Music sets in CD format. to be perfectly honest, 1, 2 and 3 were bought mostly in the hope that it would encourage them to continue, so that i may have been able to hear 4 again. but, if they release the rest, i shall buy. from what i remember 6 was a very close second favourite of mine. also, 5 has things like View To A Kill on it, which you can never have too many copies of

well, what more can i say. buy this set, i suppose, if you were there in 84 or were not. doesn't matter, it is timeless quality music (mostly). although one has to live in the here and the now - it's not where you're from it's where you're at - having the mind take a wander, or a stroll, to a particularly happy time and place in the heart is no bad thing. which is precisely what this CD set did for me.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

urinals

hello there


well, there is a bit of a clue as to what sort of content you will find here in this post right there in the title, look you see. it is not a clever or witty play on words, or rather word, to be sure. that is really what you will find here. you have, as it were, been warned, or given fair notice.

for those who prefer some sort of form of visual warning by which they decide if they carry on at their own risk or read on, well, fine. here is a picture of some bunnies. do be warned, for after that we reach the business end of the subject of urinals.

sometimes things just exist which do not prompt any thought or consideration. they are matters which exist purely for functional purposes, are accepted as such and everyone just moves on. it would be entirely reasonable to suggest (or assume) that urinals would very much fit in to this bracket. not so, it seems, not so. out there is someone what very much overthought the purpose, the aesthetics and the reason for a urinal, which led to them overdesigning it.

recently, for my sins, i travelled to that place where one should not go if at all possible to avoid. that is to the south, with south being defined as anywhere lower (in every possible sense) than Yorkshire. little of goodwill and much of ill is all that generally exists that way.

actually, in fairness my trip to the strange place was really rather good. during my visit, out of necessity i once or twice was compelled to make use of various bathroom facilities. on one such instance of this i was confronted with the below.

yes. these, i eventually worked out, are what qualify as or meet the criteria for urinals down in a place which is down in that south place. quite unexpected, really, and i must admit it took me a while to register in my mind that yes, those really were where they expected me to expel bodily fluids, to urinate or if you like to just go for a p!ss.

why. just, why, really. for what reason is it that someone felt that a urinal was not fine as it was, that it required some avant garde, post modernist artistic reimagining? really, it did not. the thing only needs to be functional and there to use.

the only reason i could think of for them urinals being all designer fancy la-de-dah was to provide patrons - gentlemen - using them with an ice breaking conversation starter. as i have never, ever had reason to start a conversation with someone whilst making use of a urinal, this is not something it is appropriate for me to comment on. with that being the case, i consulted Spiros.

several of you more regular readers will be all too familiar with my great friend Spiros. when not being the greatest legal mind of his generation, or out fighting insolent taxi drivers, usually he can be found in public bathrooms designated for use by the gentry, making short term but mutually beneficial friendships with like minded men. often (but not always) in uniform.

in his infinite generosity and kindness, Spiros agreed to pass comment. he made it most clear, in no uncertain nor debatable terms, that his preference was for no-nonsense, functional, proper urinals. quite like this one pictured below.

for him, this is where it is all at. by all, and by that i mean his, accounts, this is the only conversation piece a gentleman needs. one simply needs to stand, or if you like loiter, here and wait for a like minded chap to snuggle up next to you. when they do, you can either form a short term yet mutually beneficial friendship, or you can express a wish not to pursue such. Spiros says the way he does the latter is by angling it so that he does a little bit of wee wee on them.

as it happens, Spiros says that these days, or at least of late, he is making more friends (short term basis, etc) in elevators (lifts) than he is in bathrooms or general lavatory facilities. to this end, so to speak, he has sent me a video. one which you should watch only after being warned it is naughty. so this is a warning, and the below scrolling text is a warning.


DANGER WILL ROBINSON

RUDE AND NAUGHTY CONTENT AHEAD

CAREFUL NOW


right, this is your final warning, do not click on the video below unless you mean it.

Spiros said that i have to make it quite clear that it was not him what did that graffiti or vandalism, but he did give every indication that he wished to have thought to have done such himself.

let us be honest here, there is nothing more i can say on this subject that you wouldn't know if you are interested in this sort of thing.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the best and most important single of the nineties.......

howdy pop pickers


mindful of the fact that i am very much heading towards that point of a year when i construct a sort of "best of" thing, look you see, there is a very great danger in declaring anything to be "the best". or, for that matter, the "most important", or "most significant" and, well, so on. such shall forever be subjective, or even if it is all fact based scientific then open to debate, discussion and further dissemination. basically, calling something "the best" is a brave move, and perhaps one best not done.

something that has always stuck in my mind, then, was when NME declared Regret by New Order to be the "best and most important single of the 90s". it was not a flippant, off the cuff, limited to a possibly over excited review, either. no. they repeated this claim for a good few years.

yes, this was NME when NME was NME. as in, of value, and an important publication. normally they wielded their power for good, but their were some curious decisions they made. like, for instance, the time they effectively gifted the generally average band Cornershop a whole career as it suited them to do so for their bizarre war on Morrissey. and, maybe, their love of Regret.

please make no mistake. Regret is a good song. great, even. many would say f*****g excellent, and i would not quibble. someone or other out of the band (possibly Bernard) said that they felt it was the last truly good song the band did, and with that there would be no argument.

for some reason you might be reading this and be unfamiliar with the song, or not heard it for a while. if this is true of you, then here is a link to the video. yes, fans of such, it is indeed "that song that was on an episode of Baywatch once", or similar.

as much as i like the song, and New Order for that matter, i really do struggle with the view that NME had of it. enough to hold on to such for all these years. but it got me wondering, what would count as the best and most important single of the 90s?

just being "the last decent song" New Order did doesn't seem to tick that box. nor did the song, as far as i am aware, influence the style of the day in any way that left some sort of tangible legacy.

if you wanted to do some sort of fact based "best and important single of the 90s" thing then the answer comes to Something About The Way You Look Tonight by Elton John, which sold millions due to his re-recording of Candle In The Wind was on it. so far as i am aware all royalties off the re-recording portion of the single went to charity, so why not.

there is of course a case to say two songs hold the title of "best and most important" of the 90s, in the form of Country House off of Blur and Roll With It by Oasis. whilst both are easily listed as decidedly average songs, the chart battle brought on by the two being released at the least showed a time when music mattered.

well, dig what you dig.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

καμία αλήθεια δεν είναι ποτέ ψέμα

हरिः ओम्!

long has it been since i have used (or at least displayed) my powers of being able to see future events unwritten, look you see. far too long, maybe, or not long enough, perhaps. it is something that i do reluctantly but not in a hesitant way.

as fairly modest, infrequently regular readers will know, i have not one, not three, but two devices derived from an ancient time. they allow me to see what remains (for now) around the corner; to speak that which has not been spoken.

using this power is, simply, dangerous. i can sit here and claim that i shall only ever use it for good, but know that it cannot. anything which i foresee can be with the most perfectly good and pure and right reasons, but someone somewhere shall use it as a will to darkness. be warned of this before you follow further.

writing that which has remained unwritten makes it written, too. so, in a sense, my using my powers, to see what is unseen, makes it written, makes it seen, makes it so. i am sure that you have grasped a fair part of the complexities of this.

it is entirely possible that soon i shall be poisoned by my enemies, so that they may either cease my visions or try to claim them as their own. this is the nature of the realm i have ended up in, quite unsolicited if i may say so, except for the parts where i purchased the devices and used them. but, if it all comes to an end and in doing so one has allowed to touch a future they wished for, then so be it, it is done.

right, let me ask some pertinent and relevant questions that some of you may have. now is your last chance to leave the future to be discovered, rather than to know it.

shall Brexit ever actually happen?

8 BALL : chances aren't good
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given

will Boris Johnson become Prime Minister again in December 2019?

8 BALL :  indications say yes
MAGIC LEMON :  i don't care

if i happen to [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE] close?

8 BALL :  so it shall be
MAGIC LEMON : bang on

shall Jeremy Corbyn be elected Prime Minister in December 2019?

8 BALL : prospect good
MAGIC LEMON : bang on

will America like who is elected President in 2020?

8 BALL : prospect is good
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given

can common sense prevail and Ed Sheridan's fake records be removed from chart history?

8 BALL : the stars say no
MAGIC LEMON : when pigs fly

now might be a good time for you to pause, if indeed you are still reading. i know how upsetting, shocking, distressing or entirely expected many of these revelations about that which is to come are. take a breath, maybe have a cup of tea, perhaps a cigarette, then read on if brave.

will someone ostensibly [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE] me ever [TEXT REMOVED ON LEGAL ADVICE]?

8 BALL : no
MAGIC LEMON : i don't care

can we expect further coverage of every little temper tantrum Greta Thunberg has?

8 BALL : consult me later
MAGIC LEMON : no sh!ts given

as you can see, the 8 ball is a bit exhausted, at the magic lemon is sucking down some negative energy. in the interests of transparency i am telling you that i am taking a break here, but this is irrelevant as writing should start again quite soon.

see, told you. kind of.

is Jo Swinson going to be Prime Minister in December 2019?

8 BALL : you can count on it
MAGIC LEMON : i don't care

will my demise bring the much desired satisfaction?

8 BALL : focus and ask again
MAGIC LEMON : not listening

from previous experience i can assure you that there is no sense pursuing any more tales of the future right now. it is draining, both on my devices and on my wrists, to press for knowing that which is unknown, and the mechanisms are now saying cease. at least, for now.

well, anyway, i hope the questions answered here coherently are if not what you expected then what you can accept. please do not use these valuable insights for anything wicked, naughty, evil or wrong. knowing that which is unknown is meant to be a gift, and if rejected can so easily turn into a burden, if not specifically a curse.

yes, certainly, unless i am poisoned or similar, at some future date i will dabble some more, seeing what can only be seen with special skills. but, should i end up poisoned or similar, well, know that i did go with regret about not being able to see more for you.





वरेण्य परस्पर !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

some 63% of stats are made up on the spot

hello there


just one of those frequently infrequent look at facts and figures "behind the blog", look you see. well, maybe "in front" of, as it happens, for they concern such as you, the reader. or readers.

as you will have noticed by now, this is not a "monetised" blog. there are no adverts (unless google shove them on without telling me) and i don't do "affiliate selling". with this in mind, how many, exactly, come and read, makes no difference. i am just happy if so much as one person does. and if you are the one, many thanks.

but, then again, a look at what sees some of you come here is always interesting. so, time for a gander.

that top one, which seems to have attracted a lot of people, has me baffled. i tried the search keywords myself, both on google and on the bing, and not one of my blog posts came up on the first page. oh. maybe i should have checked it on images? not that i can recall doing any plumbing, except that one time i had a knacked washing machine.

as for the rest of the searches, well, i hope you found what you were looking for. i am assuming it is someone else with the same name as me that someone is seeking on facebook, but if for some reason it is actually me, well i am on it somewhere. to the best of my knowledge i have my account set so as not to be found via search engines. just leave some sort of message here if you are looking for me for some reason.

indeed, yes, i am very happy to at last have a footprint, or if you like presence, in Japan. a long term ambition of mine has to have had more involvement with Japan, both here on this blog and in general. when i finally get to sell something to someone in Japan on or off of ebay, i can basically leave this earth, for i have done all that i could.

of course i remain delighted and ecstatic about the significant percentage of "unknown region" visitors. to my mind they are either sailors, or on oil rigs, or on a plane, or in space. i say they, but you may be one of them, apologies for being unintentionally rude. and, go Italy! welcome to you all, but this is a surprising one. to my mind Italians would be far too busy being stylish and concerned with looking stylish to trouble an internet, but there you go.

well, anyway, it's not where you're from it's where you're at, and thank you for being here.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!