the law of selfie

hi there

well, this is quite sad, dear reader. it has begun. leaders worldwide, many of them who have indulged in this at times, have started the crackdown on us humble selfie enthusiasts. how very sad that this era of darkness, this reign of a worldwide regime of tyranny and oppression, should all kick off as South Africa celebrates 20 years of democracy.

kind of a farewell to the freedom of democracy for selfie fans, look you see.

yes, look as those people queueing to vote. for many hours many waited, putting up with the astonishing inefficiency of the authorities in charge of the election. that it might well have gone faster and smoother if they had employed the South African Post Office - assuming they were not on strike - is surely a cause for concern.

delays to voting stations opening, rival political groups doing the shouty-fighting thing, unlicensed street vendors selling pop to queues of people, officials being forced to resign due to suspicious behaviour and yet the main focus of attention was all on stopping people doing selfies.

i am led to believe that 100 (one hundred) people have been arrested for taking selfies during the election today. what an utter, utter, utter waste of time and resources.

if it takes a super twat to report someone to the police for taking a selfie, it takes a super deluxe uber twat to instruct the police to actually go and arrest the person reported. to put not too fine a point on it, if South Africa was some worry free utopia then they could dick around all they liked with wastes of time like this.

i am sure all these people queueing for hours were delighted to learn of resources being drained from organizing and running the election to attend to the top level matter of people doing selfies.

no, people probably should not have been doing selfies in voting booths. but then again, freedom of speech, yeah? what was being compromised or put at risk by it, exactly? we live in an age where people take selfies at funerals, during minor surgery, whilst attending memorial services for respected world leaders and, indeed, whilst being arrested. it might be "wrong", but if it is doing no harm, let it slide.

i would imagine some people spent a fair amount of time today just reporting random people to the police for doing selfies, then. i know of some that would have drawn up a list, just for the novelty factor.

anyway, best i be careful with my selfie hobby from now on.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hospital, jedi and shed

hi there

yeah, i am pretty baffled as to how it is i can do a full day (and an actual full day) at verk and yet still have the interest in doing an update here. especially as my day is pretty much doing this, only somewhat more professional, using capital (or capitol if you want) letters and that.

as my Aunty (no, not that one, the other one) has a great deal of enthusiasm for taking me off to that James Cook University Hospital on a weekend i thought that some of you might for some reason want to see a picture of it. the idea of picturing me bombing in and out of it in the car, a car my Gran has decided is called Bessie, by the way, is presumably enhanced by a glimpse of it.

so, from the back of the bus, here you go.

yes, that is the shadow of the bus what i was on you can see. and indeed yes they are rain clouds on what was otherwise a lovely, reasonably warm day.

as wonderful and class as it is to be able to indulge my Aunt's wishes to just pop in there on weekends, i might well be persuaded to allow my (considerably) better half to have a go at going there and back one of these days instead. it is wrong, somewhat morally, of me to deny her the opportunity to explore and see.

not that i mind, far from it. but as i am likely to damage myself at some point it probably is rather wise she knows where it all is. especially as they have a rather elaborate and unusual maze system on the go in respect of parking arrangements.

i was on the bus, mostly reading, for reasons of returning home from verk. and for those of you wanting to know how all that is going, well, here is how i beautified my "work station hub" today.

no, not the duck thing painting or the class Windows wallpaper, the Qui-Gon of the much loved film Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace that i have super-glued to the monitor. after buying it as sneakily as i could and sneaking it past the boys, who would have wanted to keep it, look you see.

everyone has one of these sort of characters on their desk, like, so i thought i had best do the same to fit in. also, it is as cool as it is class to glue Star Wars figures to monitors. once i had Anakin and Obi-Wan on a monitor at home. 

i know, i know. recalling some of my escapades at verk in the past, a lot of you are wondering about, indeed hoping for, some class updates of me with people at work showing off mugs, lighters and all that sort of thing. well, patience. i didn't get up to that sort of nonsense from day one in my last job. well, actually i did, but i sort of waited 8 - 9 years before documenting it all and putting it on here. as the time i have been in my new job is barely out of being measured in hours and can be sort of counted reasonably in days, i do not think you, i or most importantly they are ready for it, really. plus i have no new mug, and i am supposed to not have new lighters because of all that quitting / cutting down considerably smoking thing.

something that you are all enthusiastic about and i can share here with you is what Spiros is up to. Spiros has bought a new shed, or if you like semi-shed, to go with the existing shed facilities in his house in Essex or wherever it is he lives now. Kent, probably, or maybe Cheltenham. much of his life says "Cheltenham", so that's probably right.

yes, that's lovely Spiros, and it very much has "Spiros chose that" written all over it. the owl in particular is a really nice touch.

i am hoping to visit this shed, the members of Spiros' family that i actually like, the people who live near him and i suppose Spiros too at some point. so i had probably better work out exactly just where it is that him and this shed are.

anyway, too tired to do more, so bye bye now.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the return of the walking carpet

hello there

one of the more interesting flaws in the original Star Wars films - the ones where fanboys don't notice as they are not prequels and so don't moan about - was that a reference was made to Chewbacca as a "walking carpet". i think that Princess Leia one said it, asking for him to be moved out of her way.

there were no carpets on display at any point in any Star Wars film. carpets did not exist, then, in a galaxy far, far away, a long time ago.  so how come she made a reference to one and everyone agreed with it?

anyhow, one of the first official images off of that new Star Wars film that Disney is busy making. it is Chewbacca, presumably played by Peter Mayhew, stood with someone or other.

they posted this to one of them social network site things, can't remember which, sorry - was too busy just pinching the picture to post here.

the chap that Chewy the carpet is with seems to be all very excited about everything, doesn't he? well, who would not be.

i think this image might be a go or a dig at that Robert Downey jnr fella, who is posting random and unrevealing images off of that Avengers film he is making a second one of. just showing off something that the fans would actually like to see, look you see, where as Robert isn't. well, not yet, anyway. one would suspect that Robert might eventually film all of the film he is in as they make it and upload it "for a laugh"; a move that would no doubt impress studio lawyers.

right, that's that.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5 best bootleg stories

hi there

music stories are always class, are they not? well, i think so. the unusual stories too, the ones of "fun" excess and strange releases in particular. if you agree, you may enjoy this, or you may not.

to qualify, these five "best" are the best "in my opinion" and all that, this being my blog. feel free, with confidence, to disagree. there will also be a stack of things you disagree with, perhaps even dispute. that's because the nature of some of these recordings - and their odd release - are shrouded in folklore and myth. so i do not pretend this is definitive; these are the tales just on the stories i have heard.

this, kids, is a tape. you used to put it into something called a "stereo". you could record onto the tape, which was what we did instead of "downloading"; the Commodore 64 not being the best conduit for illegal downloads. well, except for Weird Science.

what did you tape? the top ten off of Radio 1 on a Sunday used to fit perfectly onto one side of a 90 minute blank. most albums ran for 40 - 44 mins, so you could make copies of an album or two your mate had. you made your own smart "mix tapes" to listen to on your walkman; with a walkman being, to keep things simple here, a prototype iPod, only way better. you made mix tapes to impress girls with, to play at parties, that sort of thing. it was awesome, and it was an art. getting a mix onto a tape so it ran either length perfectly was difficult. no digital time things for us, we had to guess how much tape we had left.

tapes were also used for bootlegs. mostly, and i have excluded for being too obvious these from this list, people had advanced walkmans that you could record on, and people recorded gigs onto tapes. every now and then, though, someone could get onto a tape something that was even more in the category of "you are not supposed to hear this" than a recording of a gig.

somehow, and we shall explore the ways here to an extent, sometimes people were able to get their hands on recordings of musicians that were never intended for release. demo recordings, ditched albums, that sort of thing. if you got your hands on such a rarity - whether you actually liked the band or if it was any good - you were celebrated. you were cool.

here, in a sort of order that amuses me, are the top five stories of bootlegs, then.

5. Rodriguez : Cold Fact

maybe this should not be so low down on the list, but this one is so well known thanks to the superb Searching For Sugar Man documentary, one that i encourage you to see, that i need not to say too much.

every generation has an album that defines it. actually, that's not true. there are more than one sometimes. there are so many albums from the 80s or early 90s that could define mine i would fear just selecting a personal choice, so i will not. for South Africans - not just whites - growing up in the 70s and 80s, it was without doubt this album. and it all started with, so far as anyone has been able to work out, a random taped copy of it arriving in Cape Town from America.

i would not wish to steal the thunder of the documentary if you have not seen it, but basically that's the power of music right there. one person bringing one tape to a country and the sound spread across it. no plugging, no PR, no press, no forcing it down the throats. just the music spread. from an album that was a sales disaster in the States. just let that sink in - of the 1000 or so copies it sold, one person took it with them to Africa and laid the seeds of the artist being a huge, huge success there. wow.

5a. Barbs - Kismet Records


yes, because it is Barbs, and Barbs has been absent here for far too long. here she is.

this cheats a little on what i said above, as some of the stuff in the Kismet Records are indeed live recordings. for the most part, however, they are not. but still, i have not given her a number all to herself anyway, rather including her with Rodriguez as they are both important to South Africa. maybe.

the Kismet records by Barbs are fandom gone insane, long before there were internets or any other means of worldwide exposure of insanity. scraped together were any odd or unusual recording - concert, non-English versions, outtakes, things dubbed off a television set with a microphone - put together in 12 loving records that only a dedicated fan could do. much, no doubt, to the distress of Barbs and her people, especially the legal ones.

no, i do not own any of the Kismet records, and no i will not. i am happy with the official Barbs that i have, thank you, and i would not want to upset her by having these.

i wonder if Barbs or her people ever sent anything back to my address in South Africa? i suppose that i shall never know. i do know for a fact that the SABC keep sending statements to me, since they are still debiting my account, sone 5 months later.

but moving on......

4. Prince - The Black Album

there is a case to say that this album defines my generation, you know. for all sorts of reason.

much has been said and speculated of this album. hopefully i shall not bore you repeating all that much of what you already know, but in the interests of recording it, a brief semi-correct history of the album.

this album was to be the follow up to Prince's celebrated, arguably greatest musical achievement, Sign O The Times. yes, i know that people prefer Purple Rain, but Sign is the true work of genius. everyone was all excited, this was going to be brilliant, and then, like that, it was "gone". about 10 days before it was due to be released, word came out that it was not to be released.

why not? a variety of reasons. and if the handwriting on this tape looks familiar, well, you will be all the more glad that blogs are typed. big, big thanks to JM and SL for sharing this image! but back to black.

the official word was that Prince decided that the album was "too spooky" to be released. there has always been a suggestion that Mr Nelson found it too spooky after listening to it on drugs, an early version of ecstacy in particular, but that's never been confirmed.

another reason - and a more plausible one - was that Warner and Prince agreed that it would be a commercial disaster. Prince sold many records to many people, you see - of any and all colour. this led, in particular with his massive, massive love-in with Europe - to jealous types accusing him of being a "sell out" and "performing for whites". an aggressive, funk-soul statement that was all black was an interesting way for him to respond.

except, of course, it would not have been. the black people who were critical of him were not worth answering, and they might have taken some of the stuff on here as him teasing and taking the proverbial rather than "returning to roots", whatever the hell that means. basically, would have given more all the more reason to be critical. as for the large "white" audience, i don't think in the late 80s they were quite ready for, say Superfunkicalifragisexy, in which Prince explores the amazing sex possible after eating squirrel meat, or Bob George, a pimptastic, sweary masterpiece. and let's not go near West Compton.

but of course, this was the first album to be cancelled at the start of the "digital age". many copies were already pressed, in particular on CD. and some of these copies, when the order came to cancel, were taken away by those people working at the plants making them, and bootleg copies thus spread far and wide across record fairs.

that was awesome. trawling record fairs to buy bootleg releases like this. you kids today illegally downloading leaked, early releases of albums have it easy, granted, but lack the fun and excitement factor.

of course, The Black Album did get a limited, two month release. you can get second hand copies of that easy enough.

why did it get released? legend has it that Prince had an idea that he could get out of his contract with Warner Bros if he released it. a more compelling legend has it that Prince was paid by Warner a straight $1,000,000 to be allowed to release it; Warner believing that they would easily coin that back in via sales of such a legendary album.

they missed the point, somewhat, of what fun it had become to try and get the album in an unofficial way, but in fairness they did appreciate the fans with the PR and advertising they gave it.

no, i just bought a copy of the official release, thanks. if i had a copy of it before the official release, and i am not saying that i did, then i would imagine i would have kept it and the memories, thanks.

3. The Troggs - Tapes

again, i suspect this is one that i don't need to say all that much about, as one would think that many know of this most celebrated studio meltdown, with most having heard it.

putting some fairy dust over it indeed. the tape is some 12 minutes of swearing. directed swearing, in fairness, but swearing all the same. it was all directed at an ill-fated attempt to record a song, one that the amount of swearing and accusations going on indicate that the recording of the song - Tranquility, since you asked - were not going at all well as one would have hoped.

how the tapes made it out into the world is a fairly well known thing - the engineers, so caught up in the swearing and astonishing meltdown in front of them, simply did not think to switch off, and either they or the producer (all, and indeed Reg Presley, claim credit for the release) let other hear it, and thus it spread.

how exactly it spread as far as America, inspiring sketches on Saturday Night Live and indeed much of Spinal Tap, is unknown. the best, most interesting theory is that our old friend, money and divorce enthusiast Ronnie Wood, is responsible. legend has it that he once played the Troggs Tape for Bob Dylan. Mr Dylan, apparently of a better sense of humour than his records suggest (except maybe his Christmas one), believed this to be the funniest thing ever. he met with Reg Presley as a consequence of hearing the Troggs Tapes, apparently. so there is every chance that Bob took a copy off of Ronnie (and i would not imagine that Ronnie charged him. much) and took it to back to the States, playing it for his mates like John Belushi and Bill Murray.

that probably didn't happen, but i like to think it did. imagine how ace it is to live in a world where legendary, celebrated rock stars, actors and comedians are as thrilled to get their hands on a rare, unusual recording and share it with their mates, too.

2. The Beatles - White Album Version 1

Beatles bootlegs are not, and have never been, all that rare. for every official release of the fab four there seems to exist 5 or 6 bootlegs, mostly of alternate mixes, the odd demo or even some radio stuff. they probably just edge out Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin in terms of "most unofficial releases" out there in the world.

this one, though, is different. it is better, as it has a way more class and amazing story behind it than any other bootleg of the band.

this release, most commonly called The Year Of Revolt as you see here, comprises of early versions of the songs that would form most of their self-titled double album that became known as the White Album for ease of reference. sure, you are saying, there are several recordings from these sessions about, both official and unofficial in respect of songs from these sessions. but not quite of the same provenance as this particular collection.

yes, that right there is Peter Sellers. he is the one behind these particular bootlegs of the White Album sessions.

Ringo Starr, you see, gave Peter a tape of the songs they were working on for him to have a listen to, or perhaps to try and impress the comedy legend. or maybe in the hope that he would pass them on to his mate Stanley Kubrick, and then Stanley would be so not displeased with Ringo that he would make a Beatles film or something. Peter, it seems, pretty much forgot all about the tape (something that one likes to think happens with every gift Ringo has ever given anyone), as it was shoved in a box and only discovered several years after his passing. it was auctioned off not long after discovery, of course, with the legalities of it all being quite tricky, one would expect.

so if you own this bootleg, you own something that came off of a tape that Peter Sellers owned. that's the kind of thing that impresses me.

in terms of that, you may want to make it Musicians 0 Comedians 1 if you are keeping a score. but my number one is an interesting reversal, with the musicians getting an equaliser, and in classic schoolboy rules, last goal is the winner.

1. Monty Python - Hastily Cobbled Together For A Fast Buck

not, i will confess, in the strictest sense a rock album, but it has music on it, so it counts.

Hastily Cobbled Together For A Fast Buck is pretty much what this album was to be. sat with a record contract and an album short, the team threw together some out-takes and unused things - notably amongst them an unreleased song from Life Of Brian - to keep the record company happy. the name of the album was in keeping with the sheer contempt Python held such records for the most part - lest we forget an earlier record was called Contractual Obligations. part joke to share with the fans, part dig at the label extracting money from the fans.

for some reason, though, it never got released. but if you are a Python fan, you will have heard it, and may well have a copy.

how is it that you were able to hear it or get a copy? the answer, as indeed is the answer to many things in this world, is Lemmy.

it is pretty much as straightforward as that, really, but to give more information, Python have always been known for their love of no-nonsense, mother my dog British rock, the pinnacle of which is Lemmy. Michael Palin was invited to do a bit of a guest spot on a Motorhead album - i think Rock N Roll, but it could have been another - and for the hell of it gave one of the few surviving tapes of Hastily Cobbled Together to Lemmy as a sort of thank you gift.

other copies of the album may have existed, or been floating around somewhere, but it was only after Lemmy got a copy of it off of Michael Palin that fans even became aware that it existed, let alone got to hear it.

it is possible, i suppose, that someone with it decided to "leak" or sell it and just let Lemmy take the blame, responsibility for it. if you were going to do that to Lemmy's name and reputation, though, you would need two big massive, sturdy balls of steel - both roughly the size of modern Asia. nothing at all about Lemmy, or his millions of admirers, of which i am one, says that he would stand for having his name slandered.

perhaps Python threw it out into the wild on their own, telling the record label and anyone else interested that they "gave it to Lemmy" safe in the knowledge that none of them would ever dare question Mr Kilmister. but it's better to think of Lemmy taking the tape, saying cheers, and letting mates have a copy and a listen.

with the exception of Barbs, perhaps, the answer is yes - all of the above are well worth getting your hands on, by fair means or foul i suppose. i have no idea at all what the Barbs ones sound like. sorry.

and that will do. many thanks for reading stories that you may well be alredy familiar with, or different versions of stories that you have heard. if there has been one or two new ones here for you, well, so much the better.

and with that, bedtime i think.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

book, beckham and tea

hi there

it, dear reader, struck me as somewhat easier to get the iTwat on the go and take some pictures than it did to simply clean up the blueberry phone camera thing. i noted with some interest, mind that the iTwat is also rather full, so no doubt i shall be required to clean that up at some point to. well, not clean. do that sort of back up stuff.

using the iTwat does, of course, afford one the potential to view some magnificent pictures taken in Commodore 64 mode with the scan lines on. and, indeed, with the dither thing on the go too, for those of you who like it.

a big(ish) warning at the start here is that there might be one or two images that spoil your enjoyment of that whole Game Of Thrones thing is you have not as yet watched the first three or so episodes of series four. so be warned, you are, look you see.
 

but to leave aside, for the moment, any such spoiler nonsense, the deo thing i am using and intend to use. actually this could all be a spoiler, i suppose, if for some reason you were wondering how it is i am able, or enabled, to smell as i do but did not wish to know until such time as you thought it more relevant to the plot or what not.

that last bit was just silly. anyway, this rather priapic-ish image on the side is the deodorant stuff i am currently using. yeah, that's right, the Pro For Men stuff that they sell at Tesco. it is the one i have found which seems to have a scent that is the least reminding to the nose of lemon scented bug spray.

do i like it? sort of, yes. of all the ones i have experimented with, however, it seems to be the one that my (considerably) better half likes the most, so stick with it, i shall. it serves its purpose in general, at least to the extent that no one to my face has said that i smell rather bad. if they do so behind my back, well, that's up to them, but if they were hoping to effect a change in that they really would be rather better off saying it to my face. or leaving a message or something about it.

eventually - possibly soon - i shall however be using this. no, not the blended shampoo featuring lemon, the cans on either side of that splendid, lemon loaded stuff.

yes. that's right. they are two tins of deodorant that have apparently been endorsed, if not designed and made, by him that did the football and that. Beckham something, if memory serves right. an American, i think, or possibly Spanish. either way, they as far as i know, smell no worse than anyone else on Earth, so he is no doubt qualified to present unto me items that will make me smell in an acceptable way.

Spiros, to my knowledge, uses one of these quite a bit. well, when he is not listening to Rick Astley on the radio, which now seems to be the thing that makes him happiest on a weekend.

not that Spiros could tell you any more about what a Beckham is than this post has. he is drawn to the fact that one of the tins, as you can see clearly in Commodore 64 mode alone, has "homme" written on it. for reasons best known to himself, Spiros is quite drawn to this word, eager to own and use products that feature it. i believe it has something to do with his ambitions in respect of living a life that its predominantly Parisian, or some other area of France that has taken his fancy.

how does this Beckham branded blended deo smell? very difficult to explain in words on a blog, really, for several reasons. one of the main, if not chief, of those reasons would be that i have no idea at all. sadly at this stage your humble narrator has not found the bravery or the moral fibre needed to even have a sneaky sample smell, let alone use it. i am uncertain, look you see, if i am yet ready to brave the ways of the Beckham lifestyle. there are, certainly, members of the Spice Girls that i would accept as being part of my life, but it is all that showing off underwear and having Gary Neville know your address that concerns me. i am not against things like that as such, but not sure i want them.

i have always assumed, indeed presumed, that there are thousands of blogs similar to this out there in the world, spouting similar nonsense, although probably better written and using as many capital letters as is required to stop one going tsk, tsk. so thanks for stopping by and reading this one.

right, i am back. sorry, my other Aunty (Susan) was wondering what would it be like if we went to James Cook on a Sunday as well as a Saturday. rather pleasant, if you were asking. the parking system they have on the go there is interesting, to say the least. quite a maze.

i promised you possible spoilers from that Game Of Thrones thing, that show where everyone is just always rude and nasty to everyone else (except in instances where they are related, but let us not go there). i know some people who have just stopped watching because they have seen the only bit that they wanted to, and now consider the series over.

so here it is, in the magic of Commodore 64 mode with dithering very much on.

from my side i have no reason to stop watching it, as several people who i find less offensive than most of the cast are pretty much alive in it. but if they decide to make no more, well, i would not miss it in the way that i, to this day, miss FlashForward. brilliant, that was.

now then, back to the world of Spiros that some of you like to learn of. a few weeks ago, and i appreciate i have been somewhat slow in reporting this, a parcel arrived for me. the postman type chap apparently found us not at home, so left it with someone else on our street who kindly came along and dropped it off.

i had actually forgotten that Spiros was chatting to a chap that offered him a copy of the Qur'an, and that Spiros had decided that he should rather arrange to send a copy to me instead.

very thoughtful of him, even requesting that they, for reasons best known to himself, address me as Reverend, and have S J as my initials. i can only imagine that he has ideas of some sort of bizarre secret life i have on the go where i use that title and those initials. i stopped asking such things of him quite some time ago, more than a decade to be honest. just accepting it all makes life a lot easier, and eases any thoughts of guilt as and when retaliation or revenge need to be extracted.

not that a lot shall be done in matters of revenge here. will i be reading the assorted literature that Spiros sent me? quite likely, yes. one should always try and understand these things, and curiosity sees me wish to have a look.

i suspect, however, i won't be taking it with me and reading it on the bus. far too big to put in the pocket of my jacket, look you see, it is. and another number of reasons, to be sure, but best left at being rather impractical to carry it about.


 

ah! and in moving on a little bit, this self-portrait, or if you like selfie. i had forgotten about this until i plugged Mr iTwat into Mr Computer.

i was in bed one evening, you see look, and leaned over to switch on the device to have a listen to something before drifting off to sleep. what? some Douglas Adams, maybe, or Mary Whitehouse Experience or possibly even the late, brilliant George Carlin. to my surprise, when i managed to get the touch screen thing working, i found that it was on sleep mode with the Commodore 64 camera still running, and by accident took this picture.

a surprise selfie, then.

why does everything off of Apple have to be all touch screen? they are like Nigel Tufnel with folded bread in this regard, really they are. if they made one of them iTwat phones that can transform practically any user into an instant dick with some proper buttons on it i would be very interested in considering one of them, or at least having a look. but this touch screen nonsense is just a gimmick, and one that has to go away, just like 3D.

and yes it is a gimmick, actually. if it wasn't, then more proper PCs would have it, right, and Microsoft would have sold a lot more of that Windows 8 thing. so there.

so yes, that spolier pic off of Game Of Thrones again for you, only this time with Scan Lines rather than that whole dithering business. see which one you prefer.

for me it is a really tough call, to be honest. everything presented via the camera of the Commodore 64 looks, as i may well have mentioned before, better than anything else, ever. feel free to use both liberally and freely, but do give spoiler warnings if you share this particular picture.

now then, where else to finish off but with tea. and not any tea, but proper, real tea. yes, that does indeed mean Yorkshire tea.

and not just Yorkshire tea either, but Gold Yorkshire tea. that means the best there is, which it must be, as the logo thing on the box says that this is the stuff that Prince Chalres uses, and one does not imagine he is a man that either drinks lesser tea or is a chap that one would seek to displease by bringing him tea that might upset him.

of course it is not actually tea that is grown in Yorkshire; the back of the box speaks of it being grown in Kenya, Rwanda and some other place that i cannot recall. it is, however - get this - blended in Yorkshire, and blended to perfection.

i am assuming that some advertising research - possibly a coke fuelled thinking tank - has determined that "blending" is the new key and buzz word to use as often as possible, as that will attract the consumers. good luck with that.

as i am as proud of my Yorkshire heritage as i am my Welsh, look you see, i obviously prefer this tea to all others. and so should you, but no i am not posting it to New Zealand before you ask.

how does this Gold version of Yorkshire Tea taste? no idea at all, really. it was with some magazine about Yorkshire that him that does the gardens and that, Alain Tittmarks or something, that i delivered to James Cook earlier today. 

and, to go back to the night before or if you like about last night, one of the pictures that i mentioned Trevor had, in his Uncle capacity, taken to distributing as a task.

a rarity, this is - one of those family pictures that was taken by someone else, and not done via the efforts of a group selfie.

many thanks Trev! great picture from a great night, even i look halfway decent in it!

and yes, sorry that the above is not in Commodore 64 mode.

well, that will be that, then, as i seem to have run out of things to say for the moment! more, no doubt, later. maybe sooner rather than later, but with all things relative, later to now.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

party

hi there

one of them rare, semi-proper family update things for those friends and family around the world. yeah, one that probably will not feature toothpaste or shampoo, at least not beyond this particular sentence.

for those readers more concerned with the more unusual and peculiar things i mention in passing, sorry, service to resume in the next post, no doubt!

last night we were fortunate and indeed honoured enough to be invited to a party celebrating Angela's recent birthday. yes, Angela of the sensational Harlo gang. what age birthday? well, in the grand scheme of things in relation to how we have chosen to measure and apply this non-scientific thing called "time", in relative terms as close to an 18th or 21st birthday as you like, really.

a big part of most parties - Harlo related ones in particular, as it happens - is of course cocktails. no, not the ones i mentioned that Colgate execs probably have as part of some sort of corporate controlled celebration, but proper, real people ones. here is young William having a go at one.

yes, quite a reaction that is, look you see. what cocktail, at his young age, was he hitting so hard with that kind of reaction, ask you? it was what one could call the ultimate trilogy, with each part being as strong as the one nearest to it - a rarity in films as much as it is in life. yes, it was a mix of coca-cola, umbrella and straw.

i like drinks with umbrellas in them. they add a touch of sophistication, class and elegance to practically any drink that the integrity of which would not be undermined by the presence of wood and paper combined to make an umbrella, which is every drink.

i seem to recall, through the haze of memories of sore heads and doing those "never again" pledges, that i have a bit of a track record in requesting, possibly demanding, drinks with umbrellas be brought to me for my pleasure in a somewhat vocal way in the past. others who have witnessed this and were of enough sober habits to recall may well wish to tell those tales, though.

onwards, then, and something of a constant for us with respect to life in 2014 is them board things with people's bodies painted on them; them ones with the hole that you stick your head through for class photography opportunities. opportunities not really related to the Pet Shop Boys song of that name, but you never know, maybe.

here would be James, along with the one they call Christopher, doing the thing that the board says that you should do.

there are many pictures in circulation presently, i would imagine, of a similar nature to the above. Uncle Trevor may well be circulating them at some stage, at least, so they are not in circulation now that i think on. Uncle Colin also will have several, but so far as i know there has been no reason for him to have ceased being at the party. it was still rocking, indeed kickin' it live, as well left rather late last night, could well be going on now still. hope so, it was great.

it was, as ever, wonderful to see Christopher, complete as his look was with his Jedward haircut, one that of course the above image fails to show off.

i have, alas, no pictures of Andrew. he was there, for sure and in keeping with the language that the kids speak, "for real, aye", but for the most part simply wished to speak in praising terms of his mate Sam, who was very much there. Sam had constructed a most remarkable cocktail, you see, and Andrew was rather enthusiastic of everyone having a go at trying it. i did not, but my (considerably) better half did, and her life seems somewhat altered by it being now an integral part of her biology.

James did not try it either, being some decade or so behind the legal age where one could try one of them cocktail things that Andrew and very clearly his mate Sam had been rather enthusiastic in their samples of, but he did rather like his "Tango surprise" one.

making a "Tango surprise" drink is quite tricky, but not impossible. one has to put aspects of a can of Tango into a suitable cocktail glass, but resist the urge to put an umbrella or straw in it. that is the surprise element, that last bit is.

the boys, as i think these images more or less make clear anyway, had a most splendid and excellent time, as everyone did. not everyone, of course, felt the need to integrate themselves quite into the festivities and formalities of the event as the boys did. here they are "helping" Angela blowing out the candles on her very splendid, exceptionally tasty, cake.

yeah, that is a poor quality picture. sorry, went for that "zoom" business with my blueberry phone camera nonsense and frankly hoped for the best. that is as good as it gets, really.

very good of the boys to step in and help. to an extent with the cake more than merely assisting in ensuring the successful, requisite matter of ensuring candle extinguishing took place in respect of compliance with all matters birthday related, but more of that later.

speaking of which, just now shall be a picture that probably should have come before the one above, but i have no interest this Sunday morning in editing how blogger feels pictures should appear. it is just a good deal easier to put a picture of Newcastle fans, unusually and entirely out of character, getting all uppity and lippy about those in charge of their club.

strange, this. usually Newcastle fans are unassuming and easy going, with no real sense of entitlement or wild expectation. as the people on the rather artistically impressive banner they have created seem to have delivered a top ten league finish, i am not sure what it is that they said they would do instead and have thus been called liars about. maybe they promised the fans one of them class relegation battles?

anyway, the cake, with the candles on the go. candles lit by me, no less, for i was the only one present with a device that could light them. a phew, then, that my efforts to quit / cut down considerably on that smoking business seem to have hit something of a pause, for in those efforts had reached optimum success i would not have had a lighter on me.

see, us smoking types are not always all that bad, we have a use and purpose from time to time that all can appreciate.

indeed yes in the background you can see a lady that was in charge of the vibes, one of 50% of the team enlisted to provide suitable birthday tunes and associated music that inspires one to dance. if i recall right, this lady also benefitted from a presentation by Andrew of how class his mate Sam was, and indeed how even more class the drink that Sam had constructed from several blended streams of drink was. that the music played with a fluent, coherent and pleasant level all suggests that she did not in fact try it herself.

to go back to the world of linear time related images, here we go with that important thing that happens after the candles have ceased to be in flame, as it were - the cutting of the cake in order for all to eat some of it.

now then, a rare treat for you all. usually Trevor and Colin avoid having pictures taken, but i sneaked one for you. sneaked as in, of course, they had no idea i was taking it. i believe this was all just after some enthusiastic raving to a few of the vibes that the kids are totally down on at the moment.

sleep, eat, rave, repeat indeed. and a very nice one indeed of Trevor to nip and get the candles for the cake, a small matter that was overlooked. and a big very nice one indeed to Colin, of course, for the magnificent food on offer, as well as the party as a whole, holistic event.

anyway, cake. although i seem to have just been involved in an argument about the low standing of the Brolin family in acting terms as a consequence of a quote off of The Empire Strikes Back. as happens more than you might have thought.

James and William were rather keen on helping hand out the cake. not, as you may have assumed, to ensure that they got a substantial amount of cake to enjoy on their own, but because they loved being able to walk around and hand out slices to all there. as you can see!

indeed, by this time of the party William, and James, were all rather exhausted and tired out from running about and having fun. it was not long after the celebration of cake, which also involved handing out a lot of napkins, that it was time to leave the party in full swing.

many thanks indeed to the whole of the Harlo gang for having us at their most magnificent event. we look forward to the next one!

oh, go on then, me. those of you who are enthusiastic about that whole facebook thing will have seen this picture, but for those of you who are not, here i am.

remember, indeed, me the this way. that is a class look, i think i shall try to look like this all the time from now on. pretty smart, that look, and will no doubt impress my contemporaries on the bus on a morning, indeed on the afternoon trip too.

right, off to do things. what things? just things.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

blended makes everything all better

hi there

well, this blog post might well be (more) broken (than usual) due to my imminent, or at least at some point, visit to the James Cook University Hospital thing. indeed, again with my Aunt. no, not that one, the other one. indeed it is sort of becoming one of them "Saturday things", but no matter.

regular readers will be aware of my interest in getting shampoo that has lemon shoved in it, like what Jason Donovan advocates, and my fascination with the recent arrival on the market of blended shampoo products. huzzah, or however you may spell it, here be the two of them on the shelf.

it is not Timotei, as i wanted, but no matter. i imagine the chaps at Garnier who made this had one of the corporate cocktail, or if you like cock tale, things to celebrate the successful launch of their impressive new range of blended shampoo stuff, and indeed the all important conditioner part. not that i use the conditioner element - to my knowledge and memory, the esteemed Jason Donovan never spoke of conditioner.

i always took it as a given that the lemon element of the shampoo that he advocated was a replacement of sorts for the need of conditioner, really. no idea if that is in fact the case.

the pricing as you see there is not all that bad, especially as it has the lemon in it that i crave. i do prefer the cheaper, more modest price sort of shampoo (even when it is rubbish, as per my post from earlier this year, Feb maybe, i am not linking it again), but want wins over preference, and i want that lemon.

and so the season ends with Boro delivering a 4-1 away win at a side long ago relegated. bravo boys, but mostly ace for the many fans - over a thousand - who made a close to 700 mile round trip to go and see.

with thanks to Sky Sports

the play-offs look interesting. Derby vs Brighton sounds like a battle of two weaker sides, but the table does not lie. ace if the Derby get back into the Premier League. if i recall right, the last time they were there they recorded a whopping 9 points for the season, 4 of which were taken off of Newcastle. so bonus if they do that again.

i would say winner of QPR vs Wigan is the likely winner of the play-off final, really. two very strong sides there, and one would suspect that QPR's financial status means they really, really need to get promoted. Boro will return to the Premier League as and when they feel a need to, i hope.

what benefit, exactly, does one get from having lemon in shampoo? the same as having blended shampoo, really. i just do not have a clue. but i have both now.

always splendid, it is, look you see, when a random surprise turns out to be what you hoped it would be. they were selling off some Star Wars "mystery eggs" in the same place where i got the blended shampoo (far be it from me to namedrop Tesco). it listed six or seven different characters you could have got, and look who i got

yes, Boba Fett. a smart keyring, some stickers and a tattoo that will no doubt look very impressive on me or whoever wears it.

actually, i didn't get Boba Fett, he was in the one my (considerably) better half got. but she kindly swapped. what one did i / she get? later on, revealed it shall be.

meanwhile, i note with interest that one cannot change the country of their PayPal account. if you move country, tough, you have to close down your existing one and open a new one. makes some sort of sense from security and that, people as they are prone to trying to move money around in less than legal ways, but a pain. i wonder if one can still however use the same acc name. i will find out.

in the mean time, to evoke Dickens, it would look like being the best of times and the worst of times for my Dad specifically, more the worst of them for love bead toothpaste fans generally. the best of times for him is that i am informed the tubes of toothpaste that has love beads shoved in it has arrived in his part of the world, much to his delight.

the worst of times is, alas, the future of international lovebead toothpaste smuggling looking rather bleak. bleak, that is, in terms of cost. have a look-see, look you see.

yes, that is a higher price. that is a 29p increase on the two tubes i bought two or so weeks ago. a frightening level of inflation that is. i am sure my Dad will skip past any concerns i have here about how much exactly i am expected to spend on buying it and sending it, but let us hope that he and some of the readers here have taken to writing to Colgate and begging, demanding or insisting that they start selling the stuff to New Zealand. or simply appoint my Dad as a "goodwill ambassador" for his services to promoting lovebead toothpaste to as many people as he can.

i did not buy any of the lovebead toothpaste today, as it happens. i did however buy some of the one that Colgate does that they shove the crystals, rather than beads, into. why? because it was cheaper. cheaper than any other toothpaste on the shelf, as it happens, for it was on one of them "special" thing.

a selection, if you will, or possibly just plain highlights, of my shopping conquests from the day today. some of you, i am aware, have an interest in what things, shiny or otherwise, are available for the consumer, indeed the purchaser. so here you go.

yes, quite a varied basket, although that does not reflect all the items; just the ones near the blended shampoo. that is indeed "pro" deodorant too. i don't know, pro deo, ultimate blended shampoo - i am becoming quite the slave of fashion and grooming in my old age. next, no doubt, i will be purchasing red shoes.

meanwhile, over the last week i have taken to the idea of a book at bus time. the ladies at the library very kindly sold me a range of paperbacks at 50p each. it has thus far been rather pleasant reading as the bus driver meanders around as many areas as he can to fluff up the time it takes to travel 12 or so miles, with time and distance falling away as i read.

a full(ish) review of the first one that i read, Ford County Stories by him that does the law books and that, will follow soon. in the mean time, these days i am reading this one.

quite good it is so far. and i am sure it looks really quite class and impressive to all my fellow passengers as i sit and read.

i note quite a few others read on the bus too. well, those not fiddling with phones and them pad things as the journey goes on. i cannot really be pestered taking technology onto a bus, my 50p books provide for all the needs that i have.

anyway, that would be about it. hopefully i shall have reason to use the blended shampoo soon and tell you all about it. i think there's about half of the other bottle i have - not featuring lemon - to go yet.

before i go, though, the other Star Wars keyring thing, then.

yes. a Han Solo one. very smart, and i would have been happy enough with it, but obviously i am delighted to have Boba Fett.

right, that will do for now and, indeedy, will have to do until i have mended the blueberry phone camera whine thing. it assures me, at this moment in time, that it has space alone for no more, but possibly less, than two further pictures. i will hoy it into the computer and do backups and that, then.

right, many thanks for reading, and nice one if for some reason any of the above was of any interest or use to you at all!


be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

subway, thrones and geography

hi there

my blueberry phone camera thingie keeps doing a sort of "whwhwhwwahahawhwa" thingie telling me that i am running out of space for pictures on it. useless, useless b@stard thing it is, is this the standard for Canadian technology is it? taking us back to the days of 35 picture camera film? there are only about 700 pics on my blueberry, hardly excessive.

anyway, perhaps i had best shut it up by deleting one or two images off of it, so best i upload a few here so they may be preserved and cherished for as long as such a thing as blogger, and internets, exist.

this, ladies and gentlemen, is the Subway of my choice. it has been closed for the last few days, look you see, for renovations. which leaves me rather at a loose end as to what to do in the rather more essential parts of town early in the morning.


the good news would be that the "open" light was on this afternoon, so i am guessing they are ready for me to return to them tomorrow. nice one.

yes, indeed, at the time i go past the Ann Summers shop is closed too, so i cannot even go in and browse there for quality garments of the underwear variety. and indeed designed more with a lady in mind to wear. but it does not hurt to have a look, you know. maybe they've started a range for the gentry, too.

moving on, and confusion is the one sitting on the iron throne of HMV. i have given them a week to clock this one and change it, but they have not, so here is the picture.

yeah, that's right. the big sign says that Series 1 of Game Of Thrones will cost one a penny shy of twenty notes, whereas the sticker on the actual discs argues quite a bit, saying that in fact it will cost you just one penny below the fifteen note threshold. that's a five note disparity right there kids. yes, indeed, i am using the "American, ghawddammnniitt i say booooi" keyboard that is the only sort one could get in South Africa, i have not bought a "dear old Blighty" proper English one as yet, so I have no dedicated key for the Pound Sterling sign and the keyboard shortcut doesn't work on blogger, right, and when i copy and paste off of Word or something i have to cock, if not dick, about with font formats to make it look right and all nice nice for you.

so that's why i write notes instead of doing the Pound sign. just in case you had questions.

anyway, i shall probably not buy the Game Of Thrones box set, then. either i will feel that i have stolen a fiver off of HMV, or i will feel that they have pinched one off of me. so i will just leave it, which is a shame, as this was the series that featured that guy in that film where they did the stripping and that, also that guy from that film that was the only decent Bond the puffy Irish one with the nancy boy voice made.

oh yes, today was also the official 25th anniversary reunion of Mr Bryant's "Class Of 1989" Geography class. the planning and that was immaculate, but the advertising was perhaps not all that it could be.

now to the untrained eye, yes, granted, that there were just the two of us there might seem like it was somewhat poorly attended. this is, however, not the case. there were only 6 or 8 of us in the class, look you see, so the percentage of us that made it to the unadvertised, spontaneous reunion is actually in a double figure percentage.

a wonderful, wonderful reunion it was too. we could have had a 20th one too, actually, except we were on somewhat different sides of the equator thingie in Africa. bit of an admin mishap.

anyway, that will do for this first post for May. who knows who else i may meet this fine month?



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!