oh yes, indeed. this post is, look you see, one of them ones which engages in a dose of the sentimental hygiene which is nostalgia. just as the title suggests. or makes clear, i suppose.
for some (no, for several) reason(s) there are those who are intent on fiddling with things. they are of a mind, usually for personal gain, to ignore the generally accepted principle of if something is not broke then waste no time in trying to fix it.
sadly this often happens in a way which tramples on peoples emotions (feelings, perhaps) about certain things. which is to say they go ahead and say f*** everyone who cares, we will mess about with this as we may make some money of doing so.
a travesty of this nature happened when my back was turned. when i was out of the country for a bit, someone somewhere thought it would be all well and good to change the name of that most beloved and treasured of sweet, the opal fruit, to "starburst".
blessed be, then, those who have returned us to the sanity of Opal Fruits, as you can see so gloriously in the above. Poundland, in answer to any question you have about who is to be so blessed. it is they who have reinstated the sweets with the proper name.
of concern is the fact that they are labelled as "limited edition", but then they did that with those "twin peaks" bars which are still on sale a couple of years later. we can but hope the same is true with these, and it does not go the way of Morrisons with marathon bars, which seem to have disappeared once more.
just why were opal fruits so treasured and revered? not to mention being an established cultural part of the English way of doing things? well, see the image above. that is taken from the celebrated engagement ring sketch by Fry & Laurie, although from left to right that is Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry in the image. of course, this was back in innocent times, before the vastly talented Hugh Laurie went on to be a huge star, and before Stephen Fry somehow managed to convince people he was wise and a source of wisdom simply by reading intelligent sounding things off of a piece of paper in a posh, decidedly condescending voice.
not all, but a considerable amount of the humour in the above sketch draws on the audience having an intimate (precise) knowledge of opal fruits. there has been a generation (give or take) which has been denied a full understanding of this comedy gold because of the selfish, misguided decision to rename opal fruits.
exactly what are opal fruits? well, the obvious answer here is that they are what starburst think they are. but, for ease of reference, they are super juicy fruit infused sweets. made to make your mouth water, is how the song or jingle used to promote them went. and they did. do, now, thanks to them being back.
it's not just any four flavours one finds in a packet of opal fruits. far from it. what one experiences is four particularly curated and cultivated selections, with them being the finest of the fine. below you can see an image of the chosen ones, with them being (in the order pictured) orange, lemon, lime and of course strawberry.
a particular pleasing, or if you like satisfactory, element of the opal fruits experience was, and once more now is, the rather complex packaging. the quasi waxy, mostly sooth, sensory pleasing paper is as difficult to take off the sweet now as it was so notoriously so in the 80s.
the obscenity that is starburst has, of course and as you would expect, no such refined principles. no, for them it is perfectly fine to have about six hundred different flavours available, rather than a select range of four. some may suggest this represents greater value and a wider choice is beneficial. i am not one.
let us not forget (and never forgive) the other obscenity what starburst is responsible for. yes, that is indeed michael bolton (more commonly known as that twat michael bolton), whose career was bewilderingly resurrected by starbust employing his services. it was not so much implied as directly stated that all starburst were infused by the power of bolton singing at trees. a brave move, and the mind boggles as to how a packet was ever sold after this promotional film (advert) was first screened.
why can they not just leave things alone? opal fruits were and now (maybe briefly) are perfectly functional, doing all that is ever asked of them. it was needless to fiddle and change any aspect of them, be it the name or dynamic range of flavours.
perhaps, like that whole marathon / "snickers" debacle, it was (and is) so that "starburst" is the name for (proper) opal fruits in america or somewhere like that. should that be so, then surely it would have made sense for starburst to change their (its) name to opal fruits.
well, that shall do for this considered look at an important subject. or, if you are of a mind to see it as such, my little petulant whine, rant or similar about something which probably doesn't matter. except for the bit where it very much does.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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