yes, i agree. quite an exciting title, that is, look you see. and, to be sure, in this post i will show you the quite simple, easy and anyone can apparently do it way that you, or anyone, can scoop any such jackpot you care to claim on any lottery.
to start with, some frames of reference. as most will appreciate, for it is commonly accepted, there are several ways in which one may secure a victory in a lottery. for the sake of clarification and completeness, here are the agreed methods -
* divine intervention from modern religions
* blind luck, or a statistical fluke
* blood sacrifices to the old gods
* science
* cheating
* stealing a winning lottery ticket off of someone
of these, we in this post....actually no, i will certainly, but you will only join in making it a "we" if you read on, shall look at the fourth on that list. quite exciting - how science enabled me to win the lottery.
that's my winning ticket. no, i do not play set numbers. one can so easily fall into that trap; if you play the same numbers more than once you are "locked in". should you risk deviating from that selection, you of course run the risk of missing out on a win. it would be unscientific. so, employing the greatest benefits of chaos theory and quantum physics, for my £2 every week i get what is called a "lucky dip".
it is the disciplines of chaos theory and quantum physics what enabled me to score this impressive win. whilst showing as much respect as i can, these are of course two complex subjects, and so for the benefit of easy reading i shall only speak of them in simplified terms here. science should, of course, be accessible to all. except them what want to do naughty things with it.
on the instance, or occasion, of the morning after one lottery / lotto draw was made, i casually logged into the website for the lottery to check my numbers. this would have all been done, of course, after i had engaged in certain morning based scientific rituals, such has having some coffee, perhaps dining on a croissant or two and almost certainly having a cigarette. or two.
there was much merriment as i checked for, according to the two disciplines of science mentioned, i had as point of fact, in a very scientific sense, won an even bigger "jackpot" prize than was initially announced.
yes, quite, indeed. as you can see above, my "numbers" had matched the requisite amount of numbers needed to earn another, technically "free", go or if you will "lucky dip". with the emphasis on a very broad overview of what quantum physics means and all relates to, this means that i find myself in a state where one possible, potential outcome is that, as and when i claim this "free" ticket, i have indeed already won the estimated £6.5million jackpot.
among, or amongst if that is right, us are those who proclaim their atheism is superior to other atheists - and therefore they are superior - because of their devotion to religion. for this senior brigade - let us call them the bishops, the cardinals or if you like the rabbis of atheism - we should cast aside anything in our society which is not based or provable by science. religion is the top of that list, for sure, but by default we would then also have to set aside things like time and money, for neither of them have any scientific base.
sure, you could say we all should simply revert money back to the gold standard, but even then no, really, as there is no scientific basis whatsoever for gold being money. it is just a belief system all buy into for the sake of an easy life. basically, mindful of my lottery win on the basis of science, if you ever meet and greet an atheist who claims one should have nothing to do with religion because of a lack of evidence or scientific proof, make sure they have neither a watch nor money. if they've got one or both, they are being rather hypocritical, or simply want an easy life.
many of you will have noticed that in the last paragraph, if you are still reading, that i correctly used the term "revert". if you ever encounter anyone who uses the term "revert back" you can, as is the case when someone says "quite unique" or "very unique", punch them in the face for their indiscretion. if it is not legal to do this, and i mean the punch in the face bit, well, it should be.
so, what will i do with the £6.5million that according to the basics of science i have already won? i am not sure. a dream of mine - a dream many share - is to win the lottery, stuff as much cash of it as possible into a smart yet functional briefcase, locate the nearest independent pimp, hand it to them and request that in exchange they supply me with drugs, with the change coming in the form of ladies of ill repute. or, in the lexicon of pimps, "b!tches", i suppose, but that strikes me as really rather crass.
i have had nowhere near as many dealings with pimps in my life as i would have liked, but still it is the case that i suspect they might be inclined to reject science. should i go up to a pimp with my scientific, quantum physics related lottery winning ticket and requested services in exchange for it, i have every reason to suspect that the result would be less pills and ladies, more threats - or actual acts - of having me taught a lesson by means of cuts and stabs off of one of them smart dagger like knives they keep concealed in their elegant walking sticks.
the same, i suppose, would be true if i waved this winning lottery ticket at a Ferrari dealership, or them fancy people what make yachts and other vessels of the sea. without actually testing this, my suspicion is that anyone with goods i may want will be reluctant to exchange them for this winning lottery loot, no matter how valid the science behind my victory is. oh, well, never mind.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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