turn it in, geezers and dolly birds
well, that sentiment above, or however it is that they actually do greet people in that there london (innit), for this is all of that place. not all of the place, look you see, but this is certainly about a rather famous section of it. yeah, a near mythical road called the m25.
i say near mythical, for that sounds quite class. also, probably true. somewhere just south of 14% of the entire population of the united kingdom encounter it on a (fairly) frequent basis, but that's purely because that is what london (innit) accounts for in terms of the population. and yet a considerably higher, very significant percentage of the population knows all about this road, the so-called m25. whether they wish to or not, for how f****d or what a mess it is always dominates national radio bulletins concerning traffic incidents and accidents.
just what is the m25? sometimes, mostly amongst trendy types, it is called the "london (innit) orbital", for it is a kind of massive oblongish circular in intent road around the business end of london (i am not putting innit after each instance, innit), the idea being to "alleviate" (or whatever) traffic going across london. the idea, i suppose, or imagine, is that one gets on this beast of a ring (but not perfect circle) road and departs off at points of it what gets to them to the bits of london that for some reason they wish to visit.
absolutely nothing of the wretched sounding thing ever suggested to me it would be smart to go on it. i mean, when it is on the traffic news (and it always is), there's always something what went f****d with it. nothing sounds normal of it. for a start, there appears to be two (2) of the b@stards in operation, or full effect. one goes clockwise, the other, as you may guess, anti-clockwise. in other, proper parts of the country, we get along just fine with driving on road system that have one option for direction?
but, of course, i did indeed (for purposes of verk) end up experiencing this cursed road. my first reaction was wow, this is massive, followed by wow, that's an awful lot of cars they have down here. cars which it seems have drivers what care not for the conventions of speed limits, or rules, or laws, or decent driving. quite a bit like Mad Max i suppose, only nowhere near as cool, and certainly no one wearing trousers what they have their @rse hanging out of. that i saw, at least. mostly i was concentrating on not getting killed off of the lunatics driving on it.
the novelty factor of driving on it wore off very, very quickly indeed. how quick? extremely. so much so that after a day or so, i went f*** this, and commanded (or charged) a younger colleague to rather drive me around it in, since they seemed to enjoy it all far more than i evidently did.
such an arrangement turned out to be mostly agreeable, with me considering how surely it must be the case that usually passengers survive car wrecks, or don't get too knacked in them. probably not, but anyway, all the same, it meant that i could, quite safely (comparatively) make the above video for you. if for some reason you were wondering what it is like on that road they always mention in traffic news, let the above give you a glimpse, if not taste.
unfortunately there is every chance, or likelihood, that i shall once more have to suffer the experience of being on this road once again. well, maybe. i mean not right now, at time of writing, for i have all that plague stuff. perhaps the plague shall yet still take me as another meaningless statistic, meaning that it is no further earthly road i must travel. but, also not.
mostly, then, with what time i have left, when the next radio traffic news bulletin update thing mentions that the m25 is broken, i can just go "well, i am not f*****g surprised the way the absolute mental b@stards down there drive on the f*****g thing". or similar, with like for like casual profanity and obscenity being included to illustrate, if not emphasise the sentiment. mostly, though, if you, too, have heard of this m25 and are curious to see what it is all about, well don't.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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