and so some more on my adventures in that there london place, look you see. yes, indeed, as the title gives every instance of indication, it was once more to my most favourite place in the whole of that fine, celebrated city. Fortnum & Mason holds a special, unique charm and attraction not solely for me but for many millions, but i can only speak of moi.
of course i called in, or popped by, Fortnum & Mason. invariably on any trip to london i would do so, but in this instance i so happened to be in the vicinity if not on then exceedingly close to my birthday, away from it in a time measured better in hours rather than days. so why would i not treat myself to some of the finest of excellence available to civilised society.
above are aspects of the items i purchased on this particular trip to Fortnum & Mason. these, and at least one other particularly fine provision, shall be explored in further detail below. to warn those who care not for such things, also below are a number of selfies, featuring moi, in and around the premises. if this is something that you have no wish to see, yet for some reason you care to read and consider what i write, then i have every confidence that you can scroll quite quickly past such images that cause such offence.
why the fascination and passion for Fortnum & Mason? over the last few years i feel that i have sufficiently expressed musings on this subject. but, for the sake of clarity whilst we are all here now, it is so that Fortnum & Mason exemplifies, indeed personifies, all that is good concerning the idea of the English way of doing things. do the finest possible and be the finest possible. this is their highly effective approach to any given matter, and reveals all that one may wish to know of any "secret" behind why they, as a provider of provisions, have existed, survived and flourished as a going concern for a good many more years than many countries in our world have even existed.
indeed, there i am, in full tilt "selfie" mode, hence it being a "reverse" image. partially i feel as though i am disrespectful to the name of Fortnum & Mason in not rotating or "flipping" the image, but for some reason it just feels correct and right to present it this way.
further, yes, once again i am wearing the Levis jacket what Zama got me off of a stall behind Jozi taxi rank many years ago. it remains perfectly serviceable, despite certain questions lingering in concern of its provenance and authenticity. perhaps at some stage i should invest in another jacket, but i am not convinced. wearing it on instances such as this feels very much like i am honouring a friend. there is also every chance that the entrepreneur who sold it to Zama (for a fee that just so happened to be exactly what i gave him, no change), is an avid reader of this blog, and takes some pride (perhaps satisfaction) in seeing where in the world a garment he sold ends up.
one major consideration in why Fortnum & Mason have flourished is that of how they have always set about things in a way which remains loyal to the values of Fortnum & Mason. but, let none speak any such ill that they do not have an awareness of external events, or accommodate such. which is exactly why one can, for a suitable seasonal period of time, purchase their special (and undoubtedly exquisite) Easter Blend tea.
did i by any chance elect to purchase some of this (and there can be no question of this being the case) finest of fine teas for Easter? alas, no. decorum and having an acute sense of perspective of my place in the world prohibited such. it was either £60 or (probably) £90 for one of these modest sized yet elegant tins of loose leaf tea. the message given by this sophisticated pricing was one which spoke of how if you were to consider the price of this item then it obviously was not meant for your consumption. undoubtedly the tea would have been far too fine and sophisticated for me, and so would have just been wasted on me.
with an unexpectedly significant amount of free time to spend in Fortnum & Mason, i took advantage. my sole priority for the day was to resolve matters at south africa house in respect of some passports. as this was achieved with (very) relative and (decidedly) comparative ease, it was my distinct pleasure to experience a rare sense of the freedom of being left to my own devices, to do that which would please me most. so yes, indeed, in the above image i am in one of the fine lifts (or elevator, if American) which Fortnum & Mason make available to select patrons.
to which levels did i go in the lift within Fortnum & Mason? very nearly all of them. i, in particular, went to the third floor, as that is where the gentleman's restroom facility is conveniently located for gentleman patrons who may care to wish to spend a penny, or are otherwise in urgent need of a gypsy kiss. oh yes, by my word, the restroom facility within Fortnum & Mason is one of the most remarkable to be found in the world. sadly, for you hoping otherwise, it felt exceptionally inappropriate to take any images of such, in particular with regards to ever present staff eager to assist being stationed there.
although rather (considerably) more famous for tea, it is so that Fortnum & Mason agree to meet requirements of all patrons, and so too sell coffee. pictured above are some examples of the coffee they sell. rather like the Easter Tea, in their wisdom it is so that they have carefully priced their coffee so as to alert people of an unsuitable class that it is not particularly intended for them. as the price of one superb jar of this coffee would cover the cost of regular, ordinary folk coffee for me for some two, perhaps three, months, i did not make a purchase on this instance.
on previous visits i had indeed experienced the privilege of purchasing their coffee. i bought one of their small, modest selection sets, priced of a fashion that only limited budget sacrifices needed to be made or were required. my experience of the coffee was that it was clearly intended for a quite different social circle than the one in which i am trapped, and so i have never felt any compulsion or need to explore such further.
go on then, another selfie. this is moi before one of the magnificent staircases, resplendent with superb bannisters and what must be the finest, most expensive carpet on which i have ever set foot. i appreciate that many (if not all) of you would have rather preferred a look in detail at what i describe, but what can i say, my blog so instead mostly it is a picture of me. someone somewhere must like such, i suppose. or presume.
it strikes me that i have given considerable time, and a straightforward to count number of words, discussing (and exploring) items at Fortnum & Mason which i did not purchase. perhaps now, at this juncture, or point, or moment, it is fitting, proper and appropriate to rather discuss items and provisions which i did, as point of fact, purchase.
the overwhelming majority of items i purchased are pictured above. for a broad overview of them, here you can see some fine Highgrove tea, which i believe is off of His Royal Highness Prince Charles. central in the image is a most agreeable sized packet of Fortnum & Mason's Afternoon Blend tea, which is splendid. finally, and by no means least, a most distinguished chalice, emblazoned with an image of the flagship Fortnum & Mason grounds, located in or on Piccadilly.
what sort of coin count did i opt to relinquish in return for these items? i suspect it would be uncouth and inappropriate to reveal precise figures. however, it could be said that i spent less than £1 per year that i have been on the planet, which when you place in such terms surely strikes one as being both reasonable and agreeable.
above is a jar of marmalade which i (fairly obviously) purchased at Fortnum & Mason. usually, or normally, it is so that i would purchase either one of their select set of three different marmalade varieties in a spiffing presentation pack, or would simply purchase one jar of Sir Nigel's special recipe marmalade. on this instance, what with it being quite near a birthday, i decided to embrace the much vaunted "yolo" approach of the youth of today (except Greta) and purchase one that i had not tried before. as you can undoubtedly see in the above, it was The Monarch marmalade which i purchased. more on this subject a little later.
perhaps, or arguably, one of the more interesting purchases i made (at least in the eyes of the more casual visitor here) would be that of the tea off of His Royal Highness Prince Charles. let me give some more detail on this for you, then, commencing with an image.
i am not sure if the above is all that clear, but you may all the same be able to detect that these are not what you would consider "normal" tea bags. no, far or quite removed from it. what one gets instead, then, are "silky" tea bags. as i am no fashionista or similar i could not say for certain, but i believe it is correct to say that they are indeed "silky" rather than allowing them to be described as "silk".
the cost of these fancy, silky teabags? once again i must insist that giving specific monetary amounts feels rather crass and uncultured. but, for those of a mind which shall not yield its inquisitiveness untl satisfied with some form of answer, i can confirm that the fee commanded by Fortnum & Mason for this is just south of the £10 price, for twenty bags reasonable and agreeable.
back, briefly, then, to The Monarch marmalade. whereas i had no regret of my purchase of this, there was some trepidation, or fear in me with regards to using it. the very name of this marmalade, and the text on the jar, did after all give every (possible) indication that it was intended for members of a social class far higher than mine. eventually, after a week or so, i did succumb and tried some.
it is perhaps best (or appropriate) to describe The Monarch marmalade as a most decidedly confrontational one. there is a very direct nature to the immediate taste, which is perhaps what one would expect. ruling monarchs do not have time to dilly dally with needless pleasantries, after all. yes, i rather like it.
let me return, then, to the (considered) matter of the silky tea off of His Royal Highness Prince Charles, and indeed my most splendid of things, the chalice of Fortnum & Mason. the consolidation of this particular tea with this particular device for consuming it represents one of the single most expensive cups of tea which i have had, if not the most. although there was one incident at Heathrow in the 90s. again, it would be quite vulgar and crass to reveal (or otherwise discuss) the price of my most splendid Fortnum & Mason chalice, but it may be said that the price commanded for it was as point of fact south of £30. somewhat.
how did i find this tea? agreeable. it would be an act of indecent dishonesty to proclaim it to be the finest cup of tea which i have ever had. experience suggests that the very best cup of tea which anyone ever has is dictated as such more due to the circumstances in which they enjoyed it, rather than the content as such.
yes, William, a keen and ardent lover of tea, was permitted to have a sip, actually, he was encouraged to do so. as it turned out, he had a more forthright response. in his view it was little more than "just water with sugar added to it", and so soon thereafter he returned to the pleasantries of Yorkshire Tea.
every visit to Fortnum & Mason undertaken by me carries with it the possibility of it being my final such excursion. one would hope such a day would not come any time soon, but often these matters are beyond any and all reasonable control. with this being something which may be true of the visit, i made the very best i could of it all, engaging in conversation with the devout staff at all opportunities. they were all quite kind and indulgent with this.
one particular exchange resonates somewhat. as i approached a till to make good payment for my provisions, a fellow patron - a lady - approached from another side and sought to "cut in" before me. the representative of Fortum & Mason, a lady behind the till, made it sternly yet agreeably clear to this lady that she was in the wrong, and must proceed to the correct waiting point for her turn of service. it was so that this patron did as instructed.
under the terms of the English way of doing things i felt particularly awkward for my entirely innocent part in this. on approaching the till i spoke to the lady representing Fortnum & Mason, assuring her that providing service first to the other patron would have been acceptable. to this the lady said that there was a special layout to service and it must be adhered to. but she also commented that i am quite the gentleman for how i spoke, and expressed a view that my wife was a particularly lucky and fortunate lady. so far i have refrained from sharing this with my (considerably) better half, so as not to upset her or hear her laugh.
well, that would appear to feel to be it for this particular episode. certainly, to be sure, there are one or two further items from my most recent adventure in london that are worth comment, i will do what i can to share such here.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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