Monday, July 15, 2019

change horses in midstream

hello there


i appreciate that there are many things i do which certain people, look you see, disapprove of. going further, i know that one in particular - smoking - is a matter that rather a many in number would suggest, or directly state, i should not do. they are not entirely wrong in the reason, assuming the disapproval or concern relates to my health and not some ambition to make me miserable.

quitting, or at the least cutting down considerably is something that i have given whimsical, speculative thought to but never really got down to the business end of. this might (might) be about to change. and no, not for health reasons or anything so trivial.

one of the main barriers to such was the puzzle of whatever would i do instead. then, with almost perfect timing if i happened to be looking for an answer to that puzzle (which i was not, but anyway), information came my way which suggested an alternate. no, not "vape" or whatever.



yes, that is some heroin, or smack, or "h", or pony or whatever the kids call it. just calling things by their name is easier, i would have thought, but no matter. certain information has come to be known to me that gives every indication of heroin being a better thing for me, and using it gaining me a much greater level of social acceptance than smoking does, what with our society conditioned to believe that cigarettes are the worst thing ever. which, for a start, means that nowhere near as many people as you might think have heard a Sammy Hagar or Mr Kim Kardassian record to make such a claim on what is the worst thing in the world.

economics (money) come to the fore here. a rather interesting story over on the BBC website (which means it must be true) revealed that heroin costs as little as £5 a go, although i suspect that is not for a packet of 20. this means heroin costs 44% of what a pack of Marlboro red does, and 57% of what a pack of the cheapest fags (Players Red or Benson and Hedges Blue) costs. switching to heroin makes a huge amount of financial sense, then. also, when you run out of heroin, you can just turn up at a hospital or whatever, say "hello, i seem to have run out of heroin", and the people there apologise and give you some more (or similar) for free, ensuring that it is decent gear and making it safe to use. should i turn up at my nearest hospital and explain that i have run out of cigarettes, i suspect it would be less apologies and offers of free replacements, more threats of arrest.

quite how and why heroin has become a cheaper, and thus preferable, alternate to cigarettes is something of a mystery. perhaps it in some way relates to the fact that heroin sales generally tend to be of an unconventional nature, and thus do not go through the taxation process. it would probably be much better, then, if cigarettes also operated on a similar basis. especially the available for free when you run out part from above.



yes, there he is, look at him. at present he is the mr king of tax collection, the chancellor of the exchequer, although his dreadful reign should be over around the time you reach the end of this sentence. it is because of him that cigarettes get taxed so high, allowing attractive alternates such as heroin to flourish. how can it be that someone who collects all the taxes and gets all the money can have such poor dress sense is beyond me. for some reason he believes that "ill-fitting" is the best way to have a suit. also, i would not at all be surprised if he has rushed into a doctor at some stage, clutching his elbow, crying "ow, ow, doctor! nurse! ow, ow, my @rse knacks".

in this day and age heroin is, of course, made to seem cooler than smoking. once it was only really just the absolute boring b@stards in rock bands that did heroin, like Charlie Watts out of Rolling Stones and him what does the guitar off of The Who. but, ever since him out of Star Wars did that film about the trains, heroin has been adopted by cooler people. ones who once would have been cool smoking, but shoot it up instead. so, in theory, i should not get quite so many judgemental looks when i spike my vein as i do now when i light one up. very wise, they will think and say, presumably.



an interesting and reasonable question is how i shall get on being a (partially) functioning adult whilst smacked on some h. when i have a cigarette it takes but a few moments - a handful of minutes - out of my life, and i can just get on as normal. my understanding is that once one does some heroin, they are left in some semi-comatose state of being absolutely sh!tfaced and unable to do stuff such as operate equipment or cars, or walk in a relatively straight line. but it is cheaper than cigarettes, and given to you for free when you run out, so it must be better. just like how, say, alcohol is not knacked or disapproved of like smoking is.

when do i plan on changing midstream from cigarettes to heroin? i am not certain. at this stage i am still not entirely sure where one obtains it from (quite a few places, going on the article and pricing, but i am not aware of them) or how exactly one goes about "shooting up" or whatever you call it. perhaps whoever is kind enough to sell me some will see the long term benefits in teaching me how it all works, as well as assuring me that yes, financially, socially and in terms of support and encouragement, heroin in our society is really generally better viewed than cigarettes.

but, you know, maybe i shall not change. as much as i respect the fact that he was mates with Bowie, i have always tended to think of my life more in Oasis songs than i have Lou Reed ones, and it is not like i think of my life in terms of Oasis songs very often. if, or when, i make the change, i suspect i shall let you know by simply not updating here as i am all smacked out and wasted. but know that it will be that i am such in a much more socially acceptable way.



be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




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