you would have thought i may have learned some form of lesson by now. them what do the lynx (axe in some corners of the world) deodorant have a habit, look you see, of misleading me into experimental purchases. it has very much happened again.
this time it is another of their "collision" or blend ones. apparently, or presumably, they have reached some zenith, zeitgeist or other such saturation point with simple, regular scents, and so now mix and match as to further exploit the market. in this instance, they have brought together mint - sorry, frozen mint - and lemon.
yes, the latter element was enough to secure my purchase. as i have documented several times in the past, lemon in personal hygiene products is quite class, for Jason "Jase" Donovan used to have it in his shampoo, and so it must be good. by means of an aside, my comments on this in the past would appeared to have made me quite the authority, for my words rank quite highly on the google for a search on the subject.
i approached this deodorant with sheer, perhaps innocent, optimism. everything about the description prompted most positive thoughts. aside from my passion for zesty lemon, how could it fail when there was the presence of what sounded like cool, refreshing, crisp (hello, Faye) frozen mint?
well, where it could fail - and does - is the part where it is left to lynx to determine or decipher what the scent of these is. apparently for them "frozen mint" has a damp, musky smell, the sort of which you might associate with certain kind of gentlemen who have been detained in a Turkish prison and have, for want of a better description, "made the most" of their time there. when it comes to lemon, apparently what lynx smell is a very sweaty, muscular, musky scent, the type of which you may well (again) associate with a gentleman who has made any number of friends whilst residing in a Turkish prison.
the standard purpose of lynx, or if you like axe, deodorants was to alert and allow feral teenagers to be drawn to each other for breeding purposes, either in bus shelters or down the sides of alleys near pubs and clubs. it would be quite far, i believe, to see that they are now looking at an entirely different demographic as a target market.
and why not, you would have to say. why not indeed. it is my understanding that the youth, the feral teenagers of today, do not seek to get completely smashed on very large bottles of exceptionally cheap cider and then engage in carnal proclivities. no, instead they just stare at them phone screen things and what have you. perhaps they are losing out, but should it be that they are happy with how life goes then there is no argument.
except, of course, for lynx, who must then find a new market for their wares. but i am rather lost at the approach they have taken to this new market. it may be worth exploring, yes, but for the life of me i cannot think of any gent who would willingly pay to smell like they have been rather intimate with a gentleman inside a Turkish prison when they could simply get themselves incarcerated and have that for free, with one or two "bonuses", depending on how you are with that sort of thing.
will i be buying any further tins or cans of this? no. i have no ambitions to be approached by gentlemen with (admittedly magnificent) big bushy mustaches, bearing names such as Ahmet, Mustafa and Berat, with them having the assumption that i very much wish for their attentions.
right, there you go. nice one if this has been of some peculiar use to anyone.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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