when i was of an age at which it was reasonably expected of me to attend such an institution, i had a teacher at school. actually, yes, several teachers, look you see, but one comes to mind at this moment. he, for his balding, exposed forehead and protrusions of facial hair exposed great folly in doubting such gender, made himself memorable by waging what can only be described as a one man war against what he saw as the scourge of batteries.
in showing the blinkered thinking which can distract such noble warriors, it was his belief that as it took more energy to make a battery than you would ever extract from it, they were a complete waste of time and so our world should be rid of them. admirable, perhaps, in terms of wishing to secure an agreeable environmental condition for those generations to come. but, also, not as helpful a crusade as it could have been, for without batteries i would not have been able to power my walkman and listen to some splendid tunes as i strolled around.
this all came to mind as i have recently experienced, or had, something of a revelation. one particular form of battery always held a secret. i have now, with some research and gentle investigation over and indeed across the realms of the internet, come to know the secret. bravely, then, i shall share this with you here.
should the above seem, to you, to be those spiffing, rectangular batteries of varying thickness used on video cameras and camcorders, that is because they are. indeed, yes, somewhat similar to the batteries which would have powered the most excellent video camera what Marty McFly used in the startling Back To The Future documentary, but not quite the same.
anyway, those who are familiar with such will be aware of the "switch" on them. on the ostensible top part of the battery, and this assumes you have inserted the battery correctly, one always found a little slip switch. should you have opened it then a little red dot would appear. this dot would disappear once you closed it.
what was this switch for, and what did the red dot signify? no reference, that i can recall, was ever made to it in any of the instruction manuals which came with these most splendid devices. in this silence, then, many took it as a given that it was a great secret shared only by the higher echelons of the great companies what made and sold these cameras, and indeed the batteries. some attributed their own meaning to the switch, with the most common conclusion being that it was "probably something to do with discharging excess energy from the battery prior to charging it again".
for my part, it is, or was, for years that i sought an answer. well, as and when i recalled to do so. this saw me scale significant mountains, so as to speak with reclusive spiritual leaders on the subject. also, on more than one instance, i travelled deep into undisturbed forests, seeking out tribal elders on the off chance that they, in their seclusion, might have been aware of what the switch was for, and what the red dot signified.
it turns out, or has transpired, that it is little more than a mechanism designed, created and implemented to be of significant benefit to the end user, or if you like the consumer who bought the camera and used it. yes, a bit like that Marty McFly. the purpose of it is for those who carried a number of batteries with them, perhaps like when they were making a documentary about how lightning and town clocks can facilitate time travel. when one battery was exhausted, or had no charge in it, the user (or documentary maker) could move the switch so that it showed the red dot, and then they would know that it was not to be used again on this particular excursion, or at all until it was once more resplendent with charge.
yes, i am aware of the great risks i have taken in exposing this secret. actually, just the one risk i suppose, as it is only one secret that i have spoken of. undoubtedly this information shall now appear, or if you like "trend", on various social media platforms. it is also possible that the camera and battery manufacturers shall seek me out, wishing to admonish or otherwise punish me for speaking of that which must not be spoken.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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