Friday, October 26, 2018

celebrating Vernon Wells through the medium of magnets

g'day


something quite exciting happened recently. well, maybe not exciting as such, look you see, but all the same a matter what got me all most pleased and happy. i was out shopping, as opposed to being in and doing so "online", and stumbled upon something called magnetic photo paper. with it being priced at all of £1 for a packet of two sheets (or if you like 50p per sheet, packaging free presumably), i figured why not get some and have a go with it.

what did i do with it first? let us be perfectly honest about it. as and when mankind has devised a new medium for artistic expression, the first instinct has always, always been to create something of a decidedly erotica content and nature to it.

having done that, and got it all out of my system and certainly not sharing it here, i progressed to the second perfectly natural thing to do with any new form of medium via which one may express artistic ambitions. this was, of course, as you hardly need me to tell you, to celebrate the magnificence of Vernon Wells.



i, in truth, must be quite careful here. my understanding would be that Vernon Wells is one of the best known people of all seven (or so) billion currently living on it, and thus any introduction to him from me would be a complete waste of time. but, that said, sometimes my understanding of certain things proves not to be as accurate as it could, and it is entirely possible - even if only due to a momentary lapse - that some of you could be quite uncertain as to who exactly Vernon Wells is.

the way forward, then, is to give an introduction to Vernon Wells here. a brief, short, quasi executive summary version of this is that he is quite possibly Australia's greatest ever actor, and this could also be said on a more global accounting system. legendary is the only way to describe his versatility. whether called on to play a decidedly homoerotic, leather wearing post apocalyptic scary psychopath in Mad Max 2 or to play a decidedly homoerotic, chainmail wearing, Freddie Mercury tribute moustached scary psychopath in Commando, Vernon Wells delivers. i have no doubt this is true of all his other no doubt fantastic performances, but i cannot think of them except Weird Science.

so, then, yes. you can see quite clearly why celebrating Vernon Wells via any sort of medium would strike one as being a very good idea. to be honest, and i do always strive to be so here, the person what invented magnetic photo paper probably only did so in order that people may use it for images of Vernon Wells, as soon as they had got magnet of erotica ideas all out of their system.



above is one of the images i took off one of Vernon Wells' greatest performance to use on a magnet. that is indeed him as Bennett out of Commando. this is indeed one of the moments in the film where he sneers in a quite scary, somewhat homoerotic in tone way at some matter or other relevant to the plot.  everything about Vernon's performance in the film screams that the writers and producers of Commando were convinced that Freddie Mercury would be cast as Bennett, and then when he wasn't they turned to Australia's finest to come in and do a tribute act to Freddie in portraying the role, right at the last minute.

this seems absurd to say, but if for some reason you have not ever seen Commando then i suggest you cease reading this, if momentarily, and go and watch it. one of the most inspirational and impressive cinematic works of all time. from what i recall my first encounter with the magnificence of the film came via my Dad procuring a dodgy copy of it off of some oil rig workers he knew, on Betamax. a mate of his had talents beyond mine and could convert it from that format to VHS, and it was a film what i held regular, after school screenings of for mates and, well, anyone that wanted to watch what at the time felt like the greatest movie to be ever made, ever.

some of you might, wrongly, be more interested in the mechanisms and dynamics of the magnetic photo paper itself, rather than the correct use of it as a means of paying homage and celebration to and of Vernon Wells. for those of you here for such, very well then, i shall indulge.



quality wise and value for money, i can assure you that this magnetic photo paper is excellent. but of course, the success depends on the quality of your printer, the images what you use and your skill in cutting the magnetic paper down to size. although yes, briefly, i did consider just making massive A4 size magnetic photo paper images of Vernon Wells, thus removing the need to cut.

if you are wondering whether or not it's worth getting some of this magnetic photo paper for your own images, my answer is yes it is. thus far i have found myself buying extra sheets whenever i am near somewhere that has it, stockpiling it for any such artistic expression which may come to mind that i believe would be best suited to being magnetic in respect of presentation.

now, then, on to what i would consider to be the greatest and most celebrated role ever undertaken by Vernon Wells, that of Wez in Mad Max 2.



this was no doubt and with no argument the most complex, difficult, demanding and challenging role what any actor could have been presented with. he, with the he being Vernon Wells, faced down all of this and delivered a performance what can only be described as a triumph. of particular note was the special trousers what Vernon Wells wore for the part, resplendent as they were with some quite remarkable arse flaps.

much as with Commando, it would be my understanding that all of you would have seen Mad Max 2 prior to reading this, or at the least reading this far. if not, go and watch it, now. for the sake of completeness, my first encounter with the film would probably have been in Australia, where it was made and where i was at the time. usually yes, Australians take pride in all that they do, but with this film they took extra pride. rightly so, too. this remains a masterpiece of cinema, and one i believe it is all but law for Australians to watch and admire and promote as showing how excellent Australians are at making smart films.

what am i planning on doing with these Vernon Wells celebration magnets? sending them on to some friends. that will probably have been done with these by the time you read this. after that, well, who knows, perhaps i shall make further ones. no, i have no idea if they will also feature Vernon Wells, or if for now i feel that i have expressed my celebration of him enough with these.



is there any possibility of me making more and exploiting them for financial gain? slight, i guess. the idea of making more and selling them is appealing as it would no doubt be quite lucrative. but, also, it would feel wrong, as they are not officially endorsed by Vernon Wells. although he has a fine name and reputation for being great with his fans, one rather suspects that this would come to an abrupt halt should an admirer exploit his work for their own personal gain.

but still, you know. i might get away with it, if no one alerts him or he doesn't notice. also, even if he did find out, i might get a cease and desist letter off his lawyers, or even Vernon Wells turning up at my house to give me a good kicking, telling me to stop. there is some appeal in such.

well, anyway, there you have it. my expectation is that all of this will have been of some considerable interest, meaning there is no need for me to express a hope that someone out there has liked this.




be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




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