in certain circles the concept of confession is spoken of as a good thing. for many it is, look you see, a healing form of catharsis. admissions of things that play on your mind in a real, vocal sense can clear the doubt, indeed guilt, from your mind.
whilst i am not certain that i subscribe to this i all the same, to be sure, feel that it is worth a go. of particular benefit is that no constraint in terms of time limitation is spoken in such circles, so it is no bad thing that this all relates to something that happened some 18 months ago. a year and a half or more, then.
this all happened, as mentioned, some 18 or so months ago. it was around about that point of a year when Spring feels sufficiently strong enough to truly break free from the constraints imposed by Winter; what with the chains of cold snapping with warmth.
for some reason, and i fail to recall just what this might be, i, or rather we for this happened in the welcome companionship of my (considerably) better half, was/were watching an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. this is somewhat unusual for me. whilst i, like most of the civilised world, profess an admiration for the many great things what Chuck Norris has done (it is all written on the internet so it must be true), i was never much of a fan of this show.
anyway, no matter, that i was watching an episode is of relevance and the reason for doing so is not. it was to be, or simply was, the case that in this particular episode, Ranger Walker (as portrayed by Chuck Norris) was in a situation in which he found himself getting attacked. this is nothing unusual as such, as fans of the show will know much of the plot of any given episode of Walker, Texas Ranger invariably hinges on some form of attack. what made this interesting, though, was that he was getting attacked off of an absolutely massive bear rather than some sort of criminal degenerate.
it is fitting that i cannot recall the plot as such, for i simply lost the plot. yes, i suspect the confession aspect of this shall commence now. but first, some guidance. if there is a massive gap between these words and the previous paragraph then you are missing some smart video i added. sorry, your browser and/or device is not compatible.
when the bear unleashed a ferocious attack on Ranger Chuck i took leave of my senses. for inexplicable reasons i got carried away, and started screaming in a quite giddy way at the television.
kill it, i wailed in my disgrace. kick it, knowing how Chuck is smart at all that kung fu kicking stuff and what have you, kick it's f*****g head in. these specific and such other words, i admit, flowed rather too freely from my mouth as i watched this battle.
my (considerably) better half? she looked at me horrified, displaying concern, contempt, dismay and some slight disgust in her eyes as she gazed upon me being so excited by all of this. it would be fair, indeed true, to say that at most times i don't have all that a good standing in her eyes, but at this moment i fear it fell to the lowest such level.
it is quite likely that as i got all carried away she expressed concern, asking what the matter was with me and being puzzled as to what had gotten in to me. i cannot recall such. my exuberance blinded me to all other concerns, leaving me deaf to any possible expressions of care or words of caution to setlle down a little bit. all i know is that i was besotted with the idea of watching Chuck Norris kick in the head of this bear.
a retrospective consideration of all this renders my ambitions and aspirations as foolish. of the many things what Chuck Norris is known for a love, appreciation and admiration for nature and wildlife is very much at the forefront. he would not willingly harm an animal and would further go out of his way to ensure such did not happen by chance or accident.
this of course serves to make me all the more retrospectively horrified as to just how badly i lost all sense of control and went totally overboard. perhaps confessing this matter here shall be taken as the first step to some form of redemption.
no, then. Chuck did not harm the bar as such. much of it in my guilt is blocked out, but from what i can recall - and as observed in these pictures and videos - Ranger Walker simply chased the bear away with an eco-friendly combination of fire and a rifle.
the confession does not cease there, dear reader. no. in a full and frank confession i will admit to, and do remember this is relevant to that moment, feeling let down, deflated, disappointed and cheated that i did not get to see Chuck do a smart roundhouse kick which culminated in his boot connecting with the head of the bear.
yes, i do feel this incident is a blight on my life. it weighs heavily on my thoughts, and i (perhaps rightly) feel nothing but guilt about my behaviour in this sorry incident. to have reacted in such a way leaves me open to being accused of existing as a blight on society; an embarrassment and shame.
do i have issues with bears? not particularly. back in the 80s i wore one of them smart NFL Chicago Bears shirts, but that was mostly as it was the only one they sold here in England. outside of the confines of a zoo or similar i am not sure that i have ever seen an actual bear. you could say oh, i saw a koala in the outback of Australia, but i am assured that a koala is a marsupial, not a bear as such.
it would be agreeable, and perhaps a little redemptive, if i could say that i wished to see Ranger Walker battle the bear with some smart karate so that i may learn how to deal with circumstances in which i was faced with a bear. alas, no. it was, to my shame, pure bloodlust.
no, i am not at all sure i feel all that much better after this confession. this was, up until now, a distinctly private guilt, a burned which weighed so heavily on my mind alone. every chance now exists that, with this in the open, people will view me in an even more harsh tone than before.
overall yes, i am very pleased that no harm came to the bear. had Chuck roundhouse kicked it in the head i suspect i would be wrought with guilt until the end of my days. instead, i contend only with my guilt for momentarily losing my senses and wishing that to be.
should this all have inspired you to confess your own shame in the hope that it has in some way made you feel a sense of relief, well then so much the better.
be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment